Hilarious And Insightful Parenting-Related Black Friday Tweets To Brighten Your Weekend

I know I’ve done a couple of similar posts in recent weeks, but dammit if people aren’t hilarious on Twitter when it comes to the holidays, and I would be remiss if I didn’t share i with you. I’ve spent my idle time this past Thanksgiving/Black Friday/Burgundy Thursday (or whatever they’re calling it now) checking out all the hilarious tweets relating to Black Friday shopping and what not, and I’ve noticed something. A.) There were some really funny moms and dads tweeting this weekend, and B.) Sanctimommies (and daddies) will shame ANYTHING, including (especially) Black Friday shoppers. Check out the funniest (and most insightful in some cases) tweets below. Preferably while eating a Thanksgiving sammich and being thankful that this damned holiday is over.

12. Anything for that (soon to be obsolete) iPod, amirite?

black friday tweets

There are various versions of this floating around, and I laugh out loud every time because I am easy to entertain.

11. Why do people do this?

black friday tweets

I totally understand not being able to get a babysitter, but isn’t this what makes Cyber Monday so useful? And if you just have to drag your 3-year-old or whatever to Wal-MArt at 1am, I think you have no area to complain when he has an epic meltdown before sunrise.

10. #Truth

black friday tweets

They sell everything at Wal-Mart. Everything.

9. Reminds me of this guy

black friday tweets

Will someone please think of the CHILDREN!

8. Only the best for my babies

black friday tweets

Let’s be honest, Sesame Street is doing a great job, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

7. We’ve all been there

black friday tweets

Show me someone who hasn’t done this and I’ll show you a liar. (Just kidding, gotta make sure that’s clear before some MRA douche comes and calls me a gold digger hoe-bag).

6. Underwear…

black friday tweets

the gift that keeps on giving.

5. It’s “only” $159.95

black friday tweets


4. Umm

black friday tweets

“Just sayin” is he equivalent of a verbal popped collar and trucker hat. It makes you look like a douche. STOP SAYING THIS.

3. YUP

black friday tweetsThis sounds like my childhood too.


black friday tweetsIt’s funny that she thinks my kids will hold on to their new toys until New Years.

1. Just a regular old shopping trip
black friday tweets


If I had a dime for every time I did this…

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  • G.E. Phillips

    My Black Friday experience consisted of going to the Old Navy that is walking distance from my apartment (the lure of 50% off of everything was just too great for me to resist!) and promptly losing Face in the store, which led to about 6 whole minutes of sheer, sweaty panic until I found him amongst the Mannequin family, standing very, very still.

    • http://fairlyoddmedia.com/ Frances Locke

      That is always where my kids end up. They’re irresistible to little kids.

    • Justme

      My daughter always pets the “dog.”

    • FormerlyKnownAsWendy

      Oh my God, I actually DID laugh out loud at this.

    • http://www.twitter.com/ohladyjayne allisonjayne

      HAHA that is hilarious. I remember trying to hide from my mom in stores when I was little. It really must’ve been horrible for her.

  • Tea

    We bought a 150$ car once, can’t say I recommend doing it even with free shipping.

  • Kay_Sue

    Can you imagine the conversation between a husband and wife when she walks in with kids from Wal Mart?

    Husband: What are those?
    Wife: I have no idea, but they were totally on rollback.
    Husband: You went in for one thing. ONE THING, Rachel!

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