• Fri, Nov 15 - 4:00 pm ET

Facebook Page ‘BAN Breastfeeding NOW’ Is The Most Epic Trolling Of Parents Ever

breastfeeding-pageOh man. There’s a new Facebook page called BAN Breastfeeding NOW and it’s basically the most massive case of trolling that’s ever graced the internet.

Let me say upfront that I am a huge proponent of breastfeeding (if that’s what a woman wants and if it works for her, her baby and her family) and I think it should be supported at all times at all facets of society. So, I admit that for about two seconds I had a tiny miniscule bit of righteous anger bubble up inside me when I saw this page, but then I spent some more time actually looking at the ridiculous hyperbole. And I cracked up.

I mean, the BAN Breastfeeding NOW page calls breasts “sin sacs” and “sexy sacs,” has dubbed breastmilk “mummymuck,” and refers to breastfeeding as “mouth raping.” There is no way that this terminology is in any way meant to be taken seriously, even by the most sanctimonious and sensitive of lactivists.

Their rhetoric is CLEARLY meant to rile people up. This is their status from November 2nd:

“…and The LORD said, all those who suckle from the teat of a she-beast, and all those who allow a swaddled babe to suckle from their teats in the name of sustenance, shall be condemned to the fiery depths for eternity. For they are wicked of heart, and guilty of an act so vile, so evil, so perverse, that they are surely akin to The Fallen Angel himself.” From the Book of Zekahdius, 33:14-18.

LOL. And another, from October 27th:

In this day and age, when we have wonderful companies such as Nestlé making wholesome babyfood, full of all the nutrients that baby needs (more so than breastmilk), why are some people still so backward thinking as to believe that breast is anything other than beastly?

The mind boggles, it really does.

If that isn’t epic trolling, I don’t know what is, especially since boycotting Nestle is a huge and ongoing movement within the breastfeeding community. Whoever is behind this page (4chan?) obviously knows who their audience is.

And OMG, their images and infographics. Take a look:

breastfeeding-3

Caption: “This is a baby three seconds after being breastfed”

breastfeeding-1

breastfeeding-2

breastfeeding4

breastfeeding-5

Of course, people are all sorts of offended and leaving outraged comments on the page’s wall and on every picture and status. It’s interesting that whoever admins the page has chosen Facebook as their medium, since Facebook is notoriously (and needlessly, in my opinion) difficult about breastfeeding photos, but it doesn’t look they’ve had any trouble displaying images of actual breastfeeding mothers, although the page has been reported as offensive a number of times.

I get that satire is a dying art these days, but how can people really think that whoever admins this page wants breastfeeding banned? It’s SO over-the-top and SO broad and SO absurd. There is not even one ounce—pun intended—of subtlety present on the page. Surprisingly, there’s not even any negative content about breastfeeding in public on the page, something that’s always a cause of controversy.

I will say that there is a detectable strain of misogyny on BAN Breastfeeding NOW, despite its satirical cleverness. In particular, I was shocked to see that the page republished the photo of Rihanna after she was assaulted by Chris Brown, accompanied by some kind of comment about stupidity. To me, that’s unacceptable. The kind of humor they’re working with is best when it’s completely and continually ridiculous, not patently offensive woman-blaming rhetoric. That’s why I have to say that I’m not 100% on board with the page. Tongue-in-cheek infographics about the rates of crimes related to breastfeeding = good. Misogynistic arguments that women deserve violence perpetrated against them = very very very bad.

Photos: BAN Breastfeeding NOW Facebook page

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  • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

    This is the best FB page ever, except like you said for the lame violent images, but the rest of it is sooooo funny

    • I’m brave behind a computer

      My new favorite past time is reading the comments left by super angry people. I seriously love it when interweb-people get really upset about nonsense. I just wouldn’t want to argue with them IRL as I imagine they’d be all crazy-eyed and spitting when the scream, and I’d be slowly backing away while using the same voice I’d use if I ran into a toddler holding a switchblade.

    • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

      The best thing on earth is some angry person with CAPLOCK fury. I love it too.

      You should see my email inbox sometime <3

  • Kay_Sue

    Satire is a lost art, so it doesn’t surprise me that folks don’t get this. If I had a dollar for every satirical article reposted as truth by various scandalized relatives on my FB feed…well, I’d be typing this on a much nicer computer in a much nicer house while sipping a much nicer mimosa.

  • Tea

    Whenever you wonder how people can think this sis serious, remember that there are still people who think The Onion is real. I’m in-lawed to one.

    • Paul White

      Yeah, I’ve had to point that out to several friends/family. “Yes, that woud be awful if it was true. But it’s from the Onion.”

    • kugolik

      Don’t forget about the Daily Currant, the terribly-written conservative sister site to the Onion! It’s even worse because the people who write it don’t really seem to actually understand satire…

    • Amber Starr

      I’m also the one who kindly leaves the snopes.com link for my friends and family who share every single thing that they read on facebook….

      “No, Dad, President Obama is NOT ordering all kittens to be tossed into a volcano to appease his Muslim overlords. Here’s a link: Snopes.com/_________.”

  • Natasha

    Ha! The serial killer pie chart. I die. If I had FB I would totes follow them. Or like, or whatever. And I BF.
    But wait, the nestle boycott? Is it because of false advertising? I’m confused. And no, I’m not going to wear a tshirt.

    • Rachel Sea

      Since the ’70s, Nestle has been sending sales reps wearing lab coats to maternity wards in Africa (and more recently to Asia, and South America), and providing free formula to women, so that they can have big strong babies. The catch is that the formula stops being free after a few weeks, when the women’s milk supply is gone. At that point they are forced to buy formula they often can’t afford, frequently made with unclean water, resulting in bottle-baby disease, where babies die of a combination of starvation, and infection. This disease kills 1.5 million babies a year.

    • Natasha

      Thank you for sharing that! I gathered that was the gist of the article, but it was a little confusing.
      That is pretty shady practice.

    • Amber Starr

      Oh wow… That’s terrible! I can’t believe that I have never heard about this before today. :(

    • Emil

      I remember hearing about that several years ago, makes me sick just to think about it. Formula companies are still shady. Early in my most recent pregnancy I randomly got sent a large formula sample. One large can of powdered formula and a can of liquid formula. I have no idea how they knew I was pregnant because only my husband and midwife knew and both were sworn to secrecy. I don’t know how these things work – how they get their information but I was a little creeped out. I guess on the bright side I never had to buy any formula, I breastfeed almost exclusively and the samples provided the only supplementation I needed. I feel better knowing that I didn’t support a company that would engage in such a horrific practice.

  • Muggle

    For some reason I’ve never been able to look at the page. I don’t know why. FB sucks.
    It was posted on STFU, Parents’ FB page a while ago and the person who posted it apparently didn’t realize it was satire. I could smell the troll from a mile away.

  • brebay

    Other?

  • FF4life

    And all of the trolls lie snug in their beds until hordes of sanctimommies bashed in their heads.

  • Ginny

    I tried to go to the page and check it out, because there is nothing more fun than people who completely miss the concept of satire and go on sanctimonious rages, but it appears to be gone. :(

    • Skipper

      Yeah, but I did find a Facebook group dedicated to banning it.

  • Skipper

    I think this is so over the top it may have circled back around to insufferable.

  • Jessica

    It’s gone! Like a candle in the wind… blown out by Elton John and his boobs…

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  • FaintlyXMacabre

    “Sin Sacks” reminds me of a satirical religious website that wrote an article about how tampons are satan’s “little cotton fingers.” Oh my stars and garters.

    EDIT: omg I just found the website: Landover Baptist. I know what I’m doing today.