• Mon, Oct 14 - 1:00 pm ET

10 Vagina Cakes For Baby Showers That Are Disturbing And Awesome

No one wants to cut into a vagina cake at a baby shower. I repeat, no one wants to cut into a vagina cake at a baby shower. Even if it is molded from the most exquisite fondant and has a cute little baby popping out of it. Actually, especially if it is molded from the most exquisite fondant and has a cute little baby popping out of it.

Look, I don’t want to insult anyone’s handy work. Someone obviously put a lot of time into these vaginas. I just don’t understand the trend of reminding a hugely pregnant woman that she’s about to have a baby tear through her lady parts. That’s not nice.

1. The “Glazed-Strawberry Lady Bits” Cake

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(Pinterest/ Brittany De Los Santos)

Realistic doll-heads are the creepiest. Realistic doll heads emerging from glazed strawberries just ruined my favorite flavor of cheesecake for me forever.

2. The “I-Just-Started-To-Crown” Cake

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(Pinterest/ Sarah Prieto)

I ended up with two c-sections, but from what I’ve heard this is the most painful part of childbirth. Happy baby shower!

3. The “Giant Vagina/ Tiny Baby” Cake

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(Pinterest/ Ashley Sloop)

The proportions on this cake are like, whoa. Also, the baby has some really impressive eyelashes.

4. The “Here I Come” Out Of Your Vagina Cake

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(happyplace/someecards.com)

Bad news – this baby is already yelling at you. Good news – he made his own bottle.

 

5. The “Your Vagina Will Soon Return To Its Former Glory” Cupcakes

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(Pinterest/ Cat Babione)

Soon, your vagina will just be a vagina.

6. The “Somebody Warn The Baby – This Vagina Has Teeth” Cake

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(Pinterest/ Mara Bernstein)

I don’t even know what to say about this one.

7. The “Your Vagina Is Actually A Tiger” Cake

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(Twitter)

My doula told me it was empowering to think of myself as an animal during birth – you know, by not being afraid to grunt and be as fierce as I needed to be. I don’t think this is what she meant.

8. The “Lady Garden” Cake

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(Pinterest/ Selkie Sarah)

Who doesn’t want their lady garden to have roses in it?

9. The “I’m Here To Haunt Your Dreams” Cake

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(Cake Wrecks)

I’m terrified of this cake. Also, it looks like the baby is missing an eye.

10. The “Extreme Close Up Of Your Birthing Vagina” Cake

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(Cake Wrecks)

Too close.

By popular demand…. Penis cakes.

AND BY EVEN bigger popular demand Vagina Cakes Part That Are Awesome And Disturbing Part Two: Electric Bugaloo 

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