unfriendFacebook — and social media in general– is clearly a sensitive landmine for many. If it wasn’t, we wouldn’t have so many unanimous Facebook transgresses and digital fight outbreaks, as well as addictions. But despite whatever awkwardness might assume your social media browsing, let us hope the happenings on digital mediums wouldn’t transcend actual dissolutions of unions or relationships. To one guy’s ex-wife, however, not being Facebook besties would hit harder than their divorce — so he estimates.

The father writes to “Dear Prudence” that his ex-wife tags him constantly on Facebook. And when she’s not doing that, he says that she’s commenting on nearly everything else — stuff that doesn’t have anything to them or the co-parenting of their two 8-year-old daughters. His girlfriend is understandably not pleased with this, but “Unfriendly,” as he signs his query, is hesitant to de-friend his ex-wife. Why? Because according to him, she would take that “blow” harder than she did their divorce..?

I’m a millennial, so the the notion that “de-friending” someone on social media can even be a major eff you was INVENTED by my generation (unfortunately). Therefore, I get it. But since when did non-digital friendships automatically translate into digital ones? I have all kinds of people in my life that are definitely not in my newsfeed, and for myriad reasons.

It’s unclear why “Unfriendly” and his wife parted ways (oh, but Emily Yoffe here has some guesses!). Not all divorces are drama fests and it’s unfair to assume that the dissolution of their marriage was an epic fall out just because they’re not legally bound anymore, especially since it seems that “Unfriendly” and his wife are happily co-parenting. But regardless of how you feel about your spouse, I would surmise that even the draining process of getting a divorce would greatly outweigh the “blow” of a Facebook de-friending.

(photo:  Oli Dunkley)