• Wed, Sep 4 2013

6 Reasons I Hate Monster High Dolls

6777599889_b7149b80c5_zThere are few toy products for little girls out right now as controversial as the Monster High doll collection (Bratz Baby Prostitots Babyz being one of them). Fans of the dolls, like Eve Vawter, cite their celebration of unconventional beauty and the themes of feminism, girl power and sisterhood found in their books and movies. Detractors are uncomfortable with the dolls’ ridiculously unnatural physical proportions, overly-sexualized dress and makeup and lack of racial diversity — a rather large lack of diversity that becomes more and more pronounced with every new release. I can understand the arguments from both sides, but if you ask me, they are just TERRIBLE.

1. They look like something Charlie Sheen would need to make disappear out of his trunk after a coke binge

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(Photo: mhghouls)

You gotta admit, there is something very dead hookerish about these dolls. Especially the one pictured above. She’s dressed like a lady of the night and she’s supposed to be an actual corpse.

2. They cater to the lowest common denominator

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(Photo:  gothic_gotti)

There has been movie and TV show/product tie ins for decades now. But never in history has it been so blatant. It used to be that a movie would lead to a television show which would THEN lead to products. Now they build the shows, movies and books around the products, with the ultimate goal not being entertainment but maximum profit. Everything else is just an advertisement. Now, I’m not an idiot; profit has obviously always been the goal, but dammit I liked at least the illusion of artistic integrity.

3. They are hypersexualized

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(Photo:  Sweet Monster Dolls)

I know this horse has already been beaten to death and is totally dead, dead dead (just like the dolls!) but I just can’t help but make this point. These dolls are very sexual. Of course, they are’t the first doll to be sexualized. Barbie has been doing it for generations. But the particular brand of sex that Monster High sells is troubling. It’s darker and more direct; where Barbie just hints at being sexy, Monster High comes right out and says it.

4. They aren’t just disproportionate. They look dangerously skinny

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(Photo: madame gurke)

This is probably something I’m more sensitive to since I have a troubled history with food and weight, but I feel like Monster High dolls are too. Damn. Skinny. Yes, Barbie and her ilk have impossible body shapes. But at least Barbie has breasts and hips. Even the old school Skipper dolls were more curvy. Monster High dolls don’t even look prepubescent. They look downright skeletal.

5. They celebrate differences only as long as you’re conventionally attractive

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(Photo:  MyMonsterHighWorld)

For a brand that claims to celebrate diversity, this line of dolls certainly lacks in that department. Yes, they might have superficially “strange” flaws, but they all meet the standard level of conventional attractiveness. All of them, with the exception of the one male doll, are feminine, skinny, cisgendered, and are either white or have caucasian features. There are NO black Monster High dolls whatsoever, and even the few who claim to have “freaky” qualities are made to reign them in.

Example: “Clawdeen Wolf” a werewolf, is said to have hair worthy of “a shampoo commercial” (and that’s just what grows on her legs). But instead of that being an awesome feature, it says in the booklets that come with the dolls that, “Plucking and shaving is definitely a full-time job, but that’s a small price to pay for being scarily fabulous.”  WUT?

6. They reinforce stereotypes

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(Photo:  Bubble_Blower)

Mean girl-esque Cleo de Nile and “dorky” Ghoulia (complete with chunky “geek” glasses!) are annoying enough, but the show has episodes where the girls gossip, backstab, and try to change themselves so their (always male) crush will like them more. Yes, it’s typical tween-age television fare, but for a show that touts itself as an alternative to all that, they sure do fit the mold.

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  • vivi

    I found out why clawdeen has that flaw. It was leaked in the monster high magazine. The creator, garett sander, siad that his flaw is that no hair grows on his head. He ddid not say that this is why for sre, but i think so

  • bob

    I agree with gracie and some of those picture of those dolls the clothes were rearranged know this for a fact because I have the same clothes on the same doll in the picture when I bought it, the clothes were in a different order. and several young kids love the dolls. also the t.v. show is about embracing you’re differences no matter what

  • Jennifer

    I think monster high is great it’s not bad at all they are not ment to be sexy they are made to entertain girls I dissagree with what this thing said I have most of the dolls my self I love them very much and I don’t think garret sanders the creator of monster high would like this these dolls are made to show girls that they can be themselves and not be someone their not. And so what if the dolls are super skinny they are dolls. Madison Beer has a monster high doll that she customized herself the way she wanted it. There are play sets that let girls make their own monster high doll . I honestly disagree with what this thing says all of these reasons are stupid Monster High is awesome and I will bring this up with Garret Sanders my self and discuss it. Stop hating on Monster High it’s telling girls to be themselves,be unique ,be a monster

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  • sophie

    clawdeen, howleen and clawd wolf are black

  • Aloccin

    Good lord are you dumb. “No black characters”? are you kidding me? in a discussion the werecats have they bring up that the werewolves are NOT furred- they ARE black- all four released werewolf siblings have VERY obviously black features- and if you actually watched the show like you claimed to have it would be very blatantly obvious how culturally diverse the girls all are.
    “Three of the main characters are wealthy and have famous fathers”- so? the show still has members of the main cast who are from all walks of life.
    And conventionally attractive? the daughter of the yeti has an underbite from hell, the daughter of the sea monster barely has a nose, and clawdeen’s oldest sister literally do not get me started.
    And there is literally no proof whatsoever that none of them are trans have you never heard of hormone therapy? Do you know how many people you have potentially offended in saying this? And just because some of the girls are in relationships with guys you automatically label them as straight? You ever heard of being in the closet, or being bi or pan?
    Last thing- their bodies are stylized. they’re not meant to represent anyone and even the smallest of children are capable of understanding that these dolls are meant to have cartoony proportions. On adults who have become so damn jaded with everything in the world that they think that everything is literal have an issue with their proportions.

  • Allyson

    I used to like monster high but after searching up another doll it shows up MONSTER HIGH I’m like WHAT THE HECK?!?!?!? I mean too much of something can make you not like it anymore… I still see monster high stuff still out there today even when I’m searching for something else.

  • barbies are for dumb moms

    http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/419c9SA5gIL._SL500_AA280_.jpg
    check this out Barbie came out with at slutty doll

  • mom who never likes toys

    I don’t like my daughters thinking they have to act and dress as trashy as a barbie doll, but I have to say no matter what the Bratz toys are many times as slutty as the barbies. Barbie is an antique and a collectible now days

  • mom who never likes toys

    Barbie Is like sharpay a pink loving blonde

  • harleyquinn

    You are moaning about male crushes, there would be more of a controvesy if they were lesbians. As for body image they said the same tthing about barbie for years and I grew up not having issues as well as my friends.