10 Reasons I Am Totally Over Stupid Summer And Ready For The Fall

I’m officially over summer. Fall is my favorite season and now that school has started again and leaves are falling all over my yard I am ready for fall to get here. The weather isn’t cooperating yet, because it’s hot and humid and generally gross outside, and I’m ready for this to be over. I wanna see autumnal wreaths on doors and ghosts in yards and to bust out the sweaters. You can have your bikinis and your beach weekends and your drippy popsicles, I am ready for fall.

I’m A Chubby Little Squirrel And I Need To Make Foods 

deb (Image: Smitten Kitchen)

I worship Deb Perelman. Smitten Kitchen is my favorite food website and my favorite cookbook and ugh I cannot say enough about Deb. She is lovely and has a ridic gorgeous kid and everything she makes that I have ever recreated in my kitchen has made me a much better cook than I ever thought possible. Her recipes are written so well and she is so funny and relatable and I swear if there is like a heaven it will involve me and everyone I love cramming into her tiny kitchen and having her cook for us. Deb’s chicken and dumplings is my all-time favorite chicken and dumplings recipe and you must go make it, now. Or make one of her other recipes instead and wait until it is a bit cooler for the C-N-D but when fall comes this is the sort of stuff I wanna eat because I need to gain 10 pounds over the seasons or I just may die when it is cold out and I need to hibernate. Not really, but I like to pretend it’s the case.

 I Need To Read Mah Books 

night film

Yesterday I got my copy of Marisha Pessi‘s Night Film and I started it and I cannot read it yet because it requires colder, rainy weather so I can wrap myself up in a blankie and stay up until four in the morning scared out of my wits. Cheek out these blurbs:

“This summer’s Gone Girl: a completely absorbing literary thriller.”—Library Journal

“A whirling, glittering, multifaceted marvel . . . an irrepressibly smart and flamboyant new voice.”—The New York Times

I love nothing more than a dark day and a good book to spend hours with. I have a few more creepy ones lined up so if anyone wants suggestions, let me know.

Sweaters  

Screen Shot 2013-08-21 at 9.00.10 AM(Image: asos)

Summer clothes can kiss my fat ass. I’m sick of shorts and sundresses and sandals. I want big drapey sweaters and layers and ankle boots and black and grey everything. Fall and winter clothing are where it’s at.

Halloween  

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(Image: Pinterest)

I LOVE Halloween. I know some moms hate this holiday but I love seeing cute little kids running around in their costumes and small size candy and decorated houses and all of it. I usually bust out my decorations on the first of October and try and do a lot of Halloween projects with my kids.

 I’m A Little Too Geeked About Fall TV 

 America’s Horror Story Coven has what seems like such a badass cast. Jessica Lange! Kathy Bates! Angela Basset! Frances Conroy! Gabourey Sidibe! From the Wiki:

American Horror Story‘s third season will center on a coven of witches that relocated from Salem, Massachusetts toNew Orleans, Louisiana before The Salem Witch Trials. The themes include witches, witch hunts, incest, minorities, slavery, mothers and daughters, and witchcraft versus voodoo.

Also, Scandal returns on October third, The Walking Dead on October 13th, Sons of Anarchy on September 10 with a special 90 minute episode and a mess of other new shows that sound promising, including some new Dracula thing by the same people who did HBO’s Carnivale. I’m an old lady and I like my stories. 

There Are Like a Gazillion Movies I Wanna See  

A new Martin Scorsese movie I am there. Also, American Hustle , CBGB, Gravity, The Carrie remake, 12 Years A Slave , Blue Is The Warmest Color , Diana , Mandela with Idris Elba (!!!!) I may as well just move into my local movie theater now.

 More Food

Purple-Candy-Apples-Timeline-Photo1-590x218(Image: Rose Bakes)

Our pinterest (This is a total hint to follow us, do it)  is going to come in super handy this fall because I always find things I have to try that don’t look too complicated, and there is no way you can eat and enjoy these in the summer. Rose Bakes has an awesome tutorial on how to make these PURPLE candy apples!

Going To The Pumpkin Farm 

shutterstock_115513990 (Image: Andy Dean Photography/shutterstock.com)

Picking pumpkins and apples and possibly petting baby goats? I am all about that life. I love cold sunny afternoons and taking my kids to these places and letting them run around corn mazes and coming home with self-picked produce.

I Sleep Better  

Maybe it’s because I am getting older but I just don’t sleep that well in the summer. I like my windows open so my bedroom is all cold and the heat is turned on and I can burrow under heavy blankies and get all cozy. In summer I find myself waking up too early and just generally uncomfy in bed. Sleep is way more delicious in the fall. Plus, napping.

 And Baths Are Better 

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(Image: Everett Collection/shutterstock)

I love baths and I hate baths in summer. Summer is shower time. I love to run a nice sudsy warm bath and hide from my kids for a few hours but it just feels icky in the summer, especially because I find myself taking multiple showers a day especially when it’s all gross and muggy out. Fall is all about relaxing baths with a glass of wine and some overpriced bath products and almost falling asleep in the tub.

(Image: Pinterest)

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    • Rachel Sea

      Oh, I miss decorating for Halloween! My wife and I used to go nuts, to the point where kids dared each other to ring the bell. Our stupid bigot neighbors and their stupid thieving and vandalism kinda took the joy out of it.

      This makes me want to go home and make spiced cider so the house smells all autumny and delicious.

      • keelhaulrose

        We used to go all out, but then we moved to a block where three of the four other houses hand out Christian literature instead of candy. I don’t care if that’s what they want to do, but even awesome decorations won’t bring in kids when they know there’s not a lot of candy. We still buy some, and usually wind up giving huge handfuls to whoever shows up. Last year we had two: my daughter, and the friend she was trick or treating with.

      • Annie

        If you live in Missouri, I volunteer to sit on your roof with a garden hose! The only payment required is a cut of the sweet stuff and permission to soak kids for target practice when boredom arises.

      • Rachel Sea

        I’m very much looking forward to turning 83, at which point I’m pretty sure I can get away with routinely hosing badly behaving neighbors.

      • Annie

        Oh no, I believe at 83 you’re allowed to use real bullets.

        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rXcWeFn-YYM

    • keelhaulrose

      I’m so looking forward to when being in a warm kitchen is something to look forward to, and not something that’s going to leave me more sweat covered than I already am.
      Plus my favorite non chocolate foods are soups. I can’t wait to make a big bowl of French onion.
      And I’m not going to lie, I love having fresh veggies, but I’m ready to be done weeding the garden.

      • LiteBrite

        I gave up on weeding my garden. For the first time ever, nothing grew, not even my green beans (which ALWAYS grow). Right now it’s been taken over by bumblebees, so I’m waiting until they’re gone before I mess around with the weeds.

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        You should see the garden I have IN MY BRAIN. every year I wanna plant a beautiful garden and do I? Nooooope.

      • LiteBrite

        My garden is far from awesome. I start out with good intentions every summer beginning, and by August I’m done with it all. Usually I get something in there though, but this year….nothing. I’m actually considering saying “the hell with vegetables” next year and planting flowers.

      • momjones

        I gave up fighting the deer. It’s always a war, but as soon as that wonderful September smell returns, I let them devour the hostas (saves me from having to trim them before the winter). They also came up on the deck and ate the lettuce in a container!

    • Annie

      I love autumn, I love it so hard I wanna marry it and wear layers and scarves and watch Charlie Brown tv specials forever. Can’t we just do that? Set up a special biodome where it’s all autumn all the time?

    • Tea

      I’m an albino, and I loathe summer (I’m iffy with winter, too, but it’s pretty at night.) Go outside for five minutes to move a couch, and oh, hey, sunburn and a rash and minor retina burns, and my eyes decide to say screw it and my visual acuity tanks.

      I miss being able to dress in all the foppy layers I want. Because compression shirt, undershirt, shirt, vest, and then a light coat in the summer leads to heat stroke. Damn my obsession with dressing like an old man and having a pocket for everything.

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        hahahahahha best ever.. dressing like an old man and having a pocket for everything

      • Tea

        I’m trying to dress like a proper gentleman, and then I see nothing but very elderly men wearing the same things I do >.<

      • Rachel Sea

        I shake my fist and curse old-man-style at chick clothes. I can’t even pocket a dime in most of my jeans.

      • Tea

        The problem is when you become a pocket fanatic, and find yourself carrying a pocket watch, a handkerchief, wallet, phone, pocket knife, folding binoculars, camera, rosary, altoids, bottle opener, Kindle,and gameboy all at once.

        My spouse says I’m turning into “The Junk Lady” from Labyrinth.

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter
      • Rachel Sea

        Not having decent pockets and refusing to carry a purse (mine was stolen in 2002 and it was so liberating, I never replaced it) has forced me to streamline. Pocket watch, thin wallet/business card case, keys, Kindle, handkerchief sometimes.

      • http://www.whatwouldshethink.com/ Rachelle

        I have vitiligo and I so understand… although I’m a bad vitty and tend to go outside in the bright sun, inverted-dalmation-lookin’ and all just because fuck that shit. My spots burn in the car so yeah, that. I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOO looking forward to layers. And everything else that Eve noted. And waiting for the first really cold day so I can totally enjoy the fireplace that comes with our new house. Yay!!!!

    • LiteBrite

      I would be over summer, except we haven’t had much of one this year: rain, temps in the 60s. This week it’s finally beautiful and in the 80s. Of course it would be at the end of August.

      But yeah, I love fall too, especially Halloween. Plus I wanna go apple and pumpkin picking!

    • CMJ

      Oh fall, you are my favorite season by far. And really, October is the best month.

      • LiteBrite

        It’s definitely my favorite month. The weather has that crisp feel to it yet you don’t need a heavy winter coat yet. Plus, you still get some beautiful warm days. I love the smell of falling leaves, pumpkin picking, and gorging on apple cider. And my favorite holiday, Halloween, is upon us, which means I get to marathon watch all kinds of stupid yet fantastic horror movies.

        It also doesn’t hurt that October is my husband’s birthday month AND it’s our anniversary. I love summer too, but it’s got nothing on October.

    • Elle

      I downloaded night film on my kindle yesterday and since my nephew was in daycare yesterday read it all in one day. It was awesome and absorbing and twisty! You will love it. Also I love fall cuz I love anything with pumpkin it…..

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        !!!! JEALOUS. did you get the groovy app?

      • Elle

        No because I didn’t know about it til I read the blurb about it at the end of the book. I’m going to reread it after I download it

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        I excited!

    • Ptownsteveschick

      I can’t wait until the pumpkin patch! It is pretty much my favorite thing. And I love soup. I make soup in the summer too, but I can’t wait for the winter soups! And more squash! And apples! Yay Fall! And scarves! And I can make myself new stylish hats so I don’t have to wash my hair! The wonders of fall are never ending.

    • Guest

      All I have to say is that your list is missing a very important piece.

      PUMPKIN. SPICE. LATTÉ.

    • http://www.whatwouldshethink.com/ Rachelle

      PUMPKIN. SPICE. LATTÉ.

      http://i.imgur.com/DNO3a.gif

      • http://www.whatwouldshethink.com/ Rachelle

        okay SERIOUSLY ANIMATED GIFS Y U NO LOVE MEEEEEEEEE

    • aileen_t

      I need that chicken and dumplings in my mouth now.

    • Kiers Kay

      I love Autumn! I actually slim down during the fall and winter months because I am way more active then. I love being out in cool fresh air. Summer turns me into a shrieking vampire that stays indoors from 10am until 5pm.

    • Emmali Lucia

      Have you seen the Garfield Halloween special?

      I know everyone talks about Charlie Brown’s great pumpkin, but the Garfield one is the best in my humble opinion.

      I think I’m going to cry at the Harvest Festival, I want it to be here so badly! God it’s just so much fun! I know that there’s more flavourful food in the summer (I’m a pretty consistent locavore, so summer is the best for that) but FALL, man. I always talk the farms into letting me bring my puppies (Well, I got Cujo in January, so it’s always just been Alejandro) into the corn mazes with me, Alejandro will just run off and I always follow every turn he makes and then get super lost and Oh my God it’s so much fun!

    • Snarktopus

      Halloween, yes. We’re the house that hands out full-size candy bars.