• Sun, Aug 18 2013

Snail Hatches Out Of Cut On Boy’s Knee, Reminds Me Parenting Sucks

shutterstock_150306782__1376840779_142.196.156.251Okay, parenting does not suck. But having to be the person who deals with stuff like this sucks. A black snail emerged from a cut on a 4-year-old boys knee and who do you think had to deal with it? His mother, of course. Please God, Goddess or whatever other divine source exists in the world – do not let this happen on my watch.

 

4-year-old Paul Franklin of Aliso Viejo, California fell and cut his knee on a rock while playing at the beach. It became swollen, so his mom, Rachel, took him to urgent care to have it looked at. The doctor told her that her son had a staph infection and sent them home with antibiotics.

After the course of antibiotics, Rachel noticed that her son’s knee wasn’t getting better – it was actually starting to turn black. She took it upon herself to lance his knee and drain it, and a small black snail emerged. A snail. In a shell. The boy named the snail, Turbo. His father believes when he fell on the rock he fell on a nest of snail eggs and one forced its way into the cut.

Now, it’s great the family can be all giggly about it and keep the snail as a pet, but I would have freaked the hell out. Realistically this never would have happened on my watch because I am notoriously bad at dealing with childhood injuries and would never lance my swollen child’s knee.

This may not trump Eve Vawter’s maggot story, but anytime a living thing crawls out of the body – I am going to freak out, mom or not. My child pulled a waterbug out of his mouth a few weeks ago, and both my husband and I stayed up wide-eyed and rocking – totally disturbed by the scene. I am not equipped to handle things hatching out of cuts on my child’s body.

Not equipped.

(photo: Paul Yates/ Shutterstock)

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  • http://www.facebook.com/valerisexton.jones Valeri Jones

    I saw this linked on FB yesterday and read it. And I have doubts that the snail hatched in his knee. The shell is extremely beaten up, so I think that maybe he fell on the snail just the right way and it somehow got lodged in the cut on his knee.

    Either way…. Gross. And I second you, Maria. I will NOT be the one wrangling snails from a festering cut on my child’s body.

  • Justme

    I’d like to say, “thank goodness that I have a girl and will never deal with gross stuff like this” BUT…I was the child who, during my athletic physical right before my freshman year of high school, had a ROCK pulled from my ear. I had no earthly idea how it got there or how long it had been in my ear….but I could hear so much better after that appointment!

  • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

    I CAN’T EVEN READ THIS I JUST WANNA SAY I HAAAAATE YOU GONNA GO CRY FOREVER NOW

  • http://fairlyoddmedia.com/ Frances Locke

    EEEK. I think I just died a little.

  • C.J.

    That’s just wrong! I have the heebie jeebiez now!

  • CrazyFor Kate

    Ewww. Ew ew ew. Ew.

  • Asia Cook

    Story Time:
    One time my cousin and little brother were playing/rough housing. The way 7 and 8 yr. old boys do. Somehow my brothers elbow hit my cousin in the mouth, knocking my cousins tooth out. Brothers elbow had a small cut that barely bled. We cleaned it up and put a bandaid on it. Fast forward 3 days later, my brothers elbow is swollen and pus-filled. My sister decided to squeeze the pus out. After some squeezing, out pops my cousins tooth that we thought got knocked out and lost somewhere. His elbow healed really quickly after that. It was DISGUSTING.

  • Ptownsteveschick

    I am gross and love picking and stuff so would probably be excited if I found a snail in my kid’s cut. But I am really gross. Go ahead and bring on my downvotes for grossness.

    • Magrat

      Upvote for grossness. I’m also pretty gross – protip: Google images is NOT a surefire way to find out what a healthy uterus looks like – and if my child were Snail-Generating Boy I would be all, “Ew, gross,” and then tell everyone.

    • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

      I upvoted you for grossness, but am still crying

    • Annona

      Yeah, no…I guess I’m gross too. I’d be pretty stoked to see a snail come out of anyone I know…

  • Rachel

    Holy crap, she let him name & keep the snail he’d had stashed in his leg? This woman must be the zen mother all mothers who want to be zen should pray to. She should be the patron saint of extremely chill women. I bet her blood pressure never even goes above 120/80.

  • BubbleyToes

    No ma’am!!! :((

  • BłuOwl

    Awww, I thought this was kind of a cute story. It’s great the boys wanted to keep the snail.
    I’m by no means a malacologist, but that doesn’t look like a weeks old snail. It seems more likely that a young snail was stuck in his knee much like a rock can get stuck. It would be interesting to hear an expert weigh in on it though. Inverts survive the craziest things!
    I would definitely be the type of parent that would want to keep the snail also. I’d much rather deal with snail knees than a diaper blowout!

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  • http://www.makingloveinthemicrowave.com/ Aja Jackson

    The thought of this makes me physically ill. I am overcome with chills and nausea. Poop stories, I can do. Snails hatching out of the knee? *Sends reimbursement receipt to Mommyish for the delicious lunch that I can no longer eat.*