Yesterday Koa gave you eight reasons to NOT seek out mom friends. Koa makes the very valid point that moms should :
not seek out friends with kids at all. Just seek out friends (some of whom may happen to have kids)
And although I love my childfree friends a ton I am still a lot more comfy with my friends who have kids. We live in the same ‘hood, meaning we all congregate in the same universe that involves orthodontia bills and Monster High dolls and knowing when toilet paper is on sale at Walgreens and dealing with kids who are dealing with giving our dogs bright blue manicures. I’m a big fan of mom friends. I have a ton of mom friends, because I include not only the mom friends I see in person but all of YOU mom people out there reading who know exactly what I’m talking about when I talk about what it’s like being a mom. Or dad. Parents are my people. And I have a mess of reasons why you should totally find moms to be friends with.
1. They Leave You Mascara On Your Doorstep For No Reason
One of my very best mommy friends did this to me, just because she purchased a new mascara and when she was raving about it on the phone I mentioned I needed to try it. After we hung up about an hour later she texted me to look on my doorstep and voila, she had bought me her beloved mascara brand for my very own. Sure, a single friend could have done this, but this mom did this because she knew I had been bitching about washing all the bedding in the house and only people who have additional beds for small people who live with them realize what a total pain in the ass this is.
2. Your Kid Will Never Have a Bigger Advocate Than Your Mommy Friend
Did you kid get bullied by another kid? Treated unfairly by a cranky teacher? Hell hath no fury like a mom who also likes your kid. I can’t even count how many times I have called up a mom friend to bitch about something bad that has happened to one of my kids and had her totally commiserate with me. Sometimes you don’t want the voice of reason. Sometimes you don’t want someone to play “devil’s advocate.” Sometimes you just want to hear another voice say “Seriously? Fuck them.” and other moms are champs at doing this.
3. They Treat The Flu Like The Utter Shitstorm Tragedy It Is
When you are sick and you have little kids and no family close by, if you tell your mom friend you are sick she will do so much stuff for you. Your kids will disappear for a playdate. You will be left with matzo ball soup and a stack of crappy women’s interest magazines. She will call you hours later and say “The kids are busy playing, why don’t they just stay here for the night?” Other moms KNOW how much being a mom who gets really sick sucks. Even moreso than your spouse. Mom cannot get sick. We are not allowed. But when you are puking your guts out and running a fever than no one will spring into action faster than another mom you are friends with.
4. They Do Not Judge You For Raging About Whatever Stupid Thing Your Partner Has Done
I believe that things in a marriage should mostly stay within that marriage, and you don’t need to go spouting off your deep darks to everyone and their dog. But when your partner does something really lame like brings you home vanilla ice cream when they KNOW you really wanted coffee ice cream with the chocolate covered espresso beans, or when they forget to fill up the gas tank, or leave their socks on the floor (And it should be noted, my brilliant husband never does these things, but he DOES magically leave his empty coffee cups in odd places, LIKE THE GARAGE) it helps when you have a mom friend to rage for five minutes because she knows you are just venting and also, her husband leaves the toilet seat up.
5. After School Activities And The School Pick-Up Forms
You wanna work out a driving arrangement for a field trip or after school lacrosse practice with one of your childless friends? You go do that and lemme know how it works out. lolcrying4ever.
6. Moms Look Out For One Another
If you are yammering to a mom about some impossible to find toy when she is at Target and she happens to see it, she will grab you one and say “Pay me whenever.” Same goes for when she is out shopping and she finds some adorable T-shirt in your kid’s size on sale for three bucks. Same goes for offering to hide Christmas presents, or co-hosting a birthday party, or bringing you Starbucks when she drops her kid off for a playdate at your house. Moms just do junk like this for other moms.
7. Hand Me Downs
If you are lucky enough to have a mom pal who has kids a bit older than you, you have probably received hand-me downs. Some of my very favorite outfits ever have been previously owned by another kid. Same thing with toys, moms are always too happy to unload nice things to you that their kids have outgrown. I give away my kid’s things too, and as long as the items are clean and in good condition , everyone wins.
8. Other Moms Just “Get It”
Sometimes I need to talk about my teenager’s dating. Sometimes I need to talk about Sons Of Anarchy, or The Dead Weather, or what paparazzo Kanye is yelling at today. The moms I know have a myriad of interests other than what came out of our vaginas, but it sure does help having someone know what changing diapers and going through teething is like.