UPDATED: K-Middy Has Begun Her Royal Labor So Let’s Mommyjack With Our Own Birthing Stories!

shutterstock_108642824__1374487060_74.134.205.46GOOD MORNING PEOPLE! Are you ready to rumble  sit around with me for the next eight or so hours waiting for updates about whether or not this ROYAL BABY is done being born yet? Here is what we know thus far, according to a very close friend of mine who may or may not be Pippa Middleton  The Daily Mail:

‘The Duchess of Cambridge has been admitted this morning to St. Mary’s Hospital, Paddington, London in the early stages of labour,’ a royal spokesman said.

 

 

Who is with her? Your very very best friends Pippa, grandma-to-be-Carole, and the man who put the royal heir into his lovely wife, Wills (Prince William if yer nasty.)

There is also some old dude named Terry Hutt,  age 78, has been camped outside St Mary’s Hospital for 12 days. Who wants to place a bet on if Mr. Hutt will be the first one to yell “That baby should really have a sweater on?”

The former soldier, who served with the Royal Ordnance Corps, is sleeping on a bench across the road from the Lindo Wing.

‘I have the best royal bed in town,’ he said.

‘I have lost my voice with all the excitement. At night we’re watching the hospital in two-hour stints, like the Army.

‘The health of the baby, and Kate, is the only important element.’

Mr Hutt is wearing a Union flag suit and tie which a Dutch firm donated to him.

‘My trousers are 10 inches too long,’ he said, adding that his wife of 51 years, Joy, think he is a bit mad.

The septuagenarian has been joined outside the hospital by ‘Diana Superfan’ John Loughrey, 58, from Wandsworth, south-west London.

‘I’m so excited I’m like a washing machine – I’m on full spin,’ he said.

‘I can’t stop spinning. I’ve been here for seven days and heard gossip overnight that Kate was here.

 

These old people who compare themselves to household appliances mayhaps need new hobbies, but who am I to judge, because it’s not even 6 a.m. yet and I am all awake and geeked out for this baby. But not like a washing machine.

Sources told MailOnline that Kate went into labour naturally and things are ‘progressing well’.

But enough about Kate and her royal uterus, tell me all about YOUR labors! Did you get a push present? Do you think Kate will get a diamond encrusted high chair from our American version of a princess Beyonce?  Is Elton John writing a song about this baby all ready?

WHO IS GOING TO MAKE ME COFFEE?

What did you guys eat for breakfast? I have not sent my staff to the market yet this week so I think mayhaps I have some getting-close-to-expiration date yogurt in my fridge.

I’m so excited about this baby, but to be honest I get sorta all geeked out about any baby being born. Babies! Babies are the best. So sit with meeee, talk to meeeee, tell me what you are eating and your best guesses for the baby name and all about your births and stuff so I don’t wake Koa Beck up and have her furrow her pretty little Bambi-brow at me for waking her so damn early!

The POC is coming!!!!!11!!!!!11!!! ‘

UPDATED: YOU GUYS THERE IS A LIVE STREAM LOOOOOOL.

MY EMBED CODE IS NO LONGER WORKING BUT YOU CAN WATCH HERE.
( Photo: Mr Pics/shutterstock)

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    • Amber

      I had a not fun birth, induced after being overdue, then stuck at 9cm for 12 hours before having to have an emergency c-section when bubs heart started acting erratically. I hope Kate has more luck and a shorter labour then I did (27 hours)…. As for eating I just had some pancakes for desert, as it’s 8.30 at night here in aus :-)

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        I think 27 hours deserves some sort of extremely fancy medal, or a whole lot of extra pancakes

      • Ambet

        I was at least hoping for a sparkly push present but alas no such luck

    • Talija

      I think I possibly had the easiest labour/birth ever. 27 minutes start to finish. Probably a little less. First contraction 2:10, official time of birth when the ambulance arrived a few minutes after I actually delivered on the bathroom floor with hubby on the phone to ems was 2:37.

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        That’s how it’s done! Was it your first baby?

      • Talija

        Yes, it was. Now I’m afraid to ever have another, because I am sure there’s payback for that due somewhere (He just turned 3 on the 15th)

      • jessica

        Come now, you can’t be certain. You might be the first lady in history to have a less than 3 second l&d. Basically, you could be the luckiest alive.

      • Elandri

        Sheesh and I thought my second child was born fast… Felt like I had BH contractions, very mild cramping, and then my water suddenly breaks. My friend’s mom helps me in the truck and probably 15 minutes later she was born. I estimated the entire thing lasted an hour from the first “crampy” feeling I had.

      • Talija

        I know, it was crazy, the whole thing was just crazy, I was talking to a friend online at 2, just chatting and joking around, then BAM, it all just happened so fast and all at once. The sac didn’t break until after he was born, and the placenta all came with it. We were actually very lucky, as the placenta had abrupted, a long labour could have cost his life.

      • Elandri

        Wow how scary! Glad everything was okay.

      • Alex Lee

        I’m new to all the birthing acronyms, so I’m just going to pretend BH stands for “baby-havin”

      • Elandri

        lol, Nah, it’s for Braxton Hicks contractions.

    • Anne

      I had a baby who was 10 days overdue AND had me in labor for 62 hours! No push present but I definitely have bragging rights!

    • Dot

      24 hours of contractions then 2.5 hours of pushing finishing with a vacuum extraction. No pain relief. Sparkly earrings from hubby and the most beautiful baby in the world :)

      Go Kate, you can do it!

    • Rose

      Got induced at midnight, got a very lovely epidural, watched Price Is Right and Daily Show reruns, started pushing at 6pm, had a baby at 6:21pm. I asked husband if I’d get a push present, and he laughed. Soooo, I guess that was that. If we have a second, I may be leaving heavier hints that I want something.

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        But did you exclaim constantly COME ON DOWN YOU’RE THE NEXT BABY ON THE UTERUS IS RIGHT?

      • Talia

        Ha! No, but I did high five my OB afterwards. If my legs were in working order, I would’ve considered doing one with a running start.

    • Blueathena623

      I know this is crazy, but I want to have another kid just so I can feel what a contraction is like. Never got that with the first one. But I’ve written my bitter c-section story enough times I’m sure everyone has read it.
      Yay royal baby!

      • DMH

        For me, it was like my worst period cramps x10. I honestly thought I was going to have a medication-free birth. No way. Kudos to the women out there that do it without the drugs, because they’re a hell of a lot tougher than I am.

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        I had the worst back labor ever. OMG. with all my kids. and with my first, when my water broke I bled a ton during transition and I stood up and told everyone I was leaving and slipped on my own blood yay

      • http://www.whatwouldshethink.com/ Rachelle

        EPIC.

      • Blueathena623

        I’m not saying I would go without pain management, because I’m a wuss, but I want to feel a few instead of a wham bam ” since you’re already here and the OR is free” c-section birth.

      • DMH

        Oh no, I totally get it. I just mentioned it because I had originally wanted to not have the epidural.. Until I felt the contractions.

      • whiteroses

        I had a med-free birth completely by accident. Trust me, you don’t want that.

      • kitten

        dont hold onto the dream too much, i wanted to feel a ‘real’ labor, i was induced with the first and second and i wanted to actually go into labor. baby three of course, was also induced so i didnt get my “going into labor”, but ive got three healthy kids :) (all were medically necissary inductions, incase anyone gets PO’d. pre-e, then cholestasis and diabetes, then cholestais and preterm labor)

      • http://twitter.com/mariaguido Maria Guido

        I hate to break it to you, but sometimes kid #2 comes AND YOU NEVER GO INTO LABOR. I’m mean “i.” I never went into labor. Two kids and I have no idea what a contraction feels like. And I was pregnant for 42 weeks, so there’s that.

      • http://twitter.com/mariaguido Maria Guido

        “I” mean, not “I’M” mean. I’m not mean. Usually.

    • Alex Lee

      mayhaps

      We’re done here.

    • Jessie

      SHHHHH… Do you hear that? It’s the sound of the Internet EXPLODING, just as I predicted. XD
      I have no labor stories, but I just hope the kid is born today so that everyone who kept shouting that baby would be a Leo will STFU. Born under Cancer all the way! :D (Can you tell that’s my sign? XD) Though yes, the baby would be on the cusp so the Leo lovers might be satisfied.

      Astrological nonsense aside, I will also sort of chuckle a little if it’s a boy, because I’ve seen SOOOOOO many people talk about this baby using feminine pronouns like they’re CERTAIN it’s a girl. However, I’ll admit to a teensy hope that we get a little princess and see some history in the making. :)

      • Jessie

        Correction: I hope they are born before 4:22pm today, as the sun moves into Leo after that.

        But all this craziness aside, I hope the Duchess just has a healthy child, boy or girl, Cancer or Leo, human or sea monkey. Best wishes to the royal family for their newest addition. <3

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        awwww, bebe sea monkeys!

    • http://www.whatwouldshethink.com/ Rachelle

      O Eve, did you wrangle the Royal Birth from Koa as retribution for North West?

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        SHE was sleeping. That’s what she gets. My spidey sense told me SOMETHING was going on

    • http://www.whatwouldshethink.com/ Rachelle

      3 weeks of pre-labour contractions, 3 days in the hospital with irregular but very close contractions, me begging to have my water broken so that my husband wouldn’t have to sleep on a hospital floor for one more night > I made it to 3cm dilated after 6 hours of painful contractions before begging for the juice. Accidentally pulled out my juice plug when trying to flip a sunny side up baby. Got a brand new juice plug while my Mom (very seriously) begged the hospital staff to cut me open and get the baby out because she couldn’t handle seeing her daughter in pain. Pushed out this wonderful little pisser 6 hours later.

    • Michelle

      I was induced on a Monday morning and didn’t progress at all for 24 hours. I let my husband run to Chipotle Tuesday afternoon since I was stuck at 2cm and figured we still had hours before anything got exciting. Just 15 minutes later I was at 10cm with me calling him frantically telling him to come back!

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        and you did not get Chipolte :( I hope he got you some when you were done

    • DMH

      Oh god.. What a day that was. With this being my first pregnancy, I had no idea what to expect. The night before I had my son I didn’t get any sleep since I was having what I thought were false contractions. So in the morning, my husband gets home from work. I was feeling like complete shit, still having those damn false contractions. He suggests taking a hot bubble bath to help feel better. No luck. But, I have stuff to do and I wasn’t going to let me feeling like crap get in the way. So I take the car to the shop for some damage estimate back from when we were rear ended. Still having contractions, and by this time I’m thinking, “this is weird” and that I was going to definitely bring it up to the nurse at my scheduled check up later that day. I get home and mention it to my husband and then lay down to take a nap. No luck. When I noticed a pattern I dug out my cell phone to time them. 3 minutes apart, 1 minute long. This definitely can’t be right, I’m not due for another month and a half. Poor hubby is rubbing my back even though it doesn’t help. 1:30 rolls around. I get ready to go to my appointment and tell him he might as well stay home and get some sleep since he had a hard night at work. Big mistake. I get to my appointment in tears (thank god we live only 30 minutes away). Like a stroke of genius, the nurse asks me, “you’re in a lot of pain, aren’t you?” Ya think? Quick walk over to Triage, a few tests later, and I’m calling the house and texting my husband “GET HERE NOW.” Nurse said I was approximately 4cm dilated. WTF? In walks the hubby, and we’re taken over to the delivery room. 6pm, epidural. Finally able to get some painless sleep. 8pm, wake up to talk to the Neonatologist about what will happen with our baby, possible issues that may arise, et cetera. Another nap. 10pm rolls around and it’s time to push. I’m shaking like a damn leaf. 10:25 we have a little 4lb 5.5oz screaming boy. He’s okay, and he’s beautiful. Looking back on it, I feel like I was incredibly stupid for thinking they were false contractions. I should have called my doctor rather than thinking I would be dismissed as a crazy, overly anxious pregnant lady. All those times when I felt like I peed myself whenever I sat down wasn’t from my body changing, it was from my water breaking. I felt like the worst person in the world for about a month after my son was born because I felt like I could have prevented my his premature birth, and him being in the NICU was my fault. In the end, I still feel like that to a degree. I’m just glad he turned out to be a healthy, happy baby and we at least know what to expect with our next one. And I won’t be scared to pick up the phone.

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        awwwww, that was so NOT pee. and yay I am glad it all worked out fab

    • LiteBrite

      I’m pretty freaking excited for the royal baby. One of my co-workers is due this week too, so I’m doubly freaking excited for baby week. I was positive she would go into labor this past weekend, but nada. I feel so bad for her; she looks miserable.

      I have no exciting birthing story to mommyjack with. I found out C was breech, and I had would have to have a scheduled C-section. The only excitement is that my doctor neglected to tell me I shouldn’t eat beforehand, so I had to wait an additional five hours to go in due to the breakfast I chowed down. Ah well.

      So I get to live vicariously through you all. :)

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        MOST IMPORTANTLY, WHAT DID YOU EAT?

      • LiteBrite

        Ha ha…leftover chili. Yeah, that was great right before surgery.

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        This is probably the saddest story in the world

    • Justme

      Induction followed by epidural and dropping heart rate which ultimately ended in a c-section. Great recovery, big baby girl (8lb. 6oz. and 21.5 in.) and no plans for another one.

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        I love big babies, because you know all babies drop weight before their first checkup so moms can panic less

      • Justme

        I’m 6’0 and my husband and I both coach girls’ sports (volleyball and basketball) and so there I was, lying with my guts out on the table under the bright lights, shivering and shaking from the meds as my husband went back and forth between the baby and the surgery table. And what did I ask him? Not if she was healthy or pretty or had all the requisite parts but instead….HOW BIG IS SHE?! I desperately wanted a long and lean little girl. And that’s exactly what I got – she is now two and hitting and catching the volleyball. ;)

    • Reabies

      Haha I am definitely watching the live feed! I’m a British expat in China, hoping she pops it out before I have to go to bed. C’mon Kate! (No babies for me yet)

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        haha I am watching too, it’s so boring so far, let’s watch cars drive by.. wheeee

      • DMH

        Lol I just saw a guy in a turquoise tank top and cowboy hat emerge from the bottom of the screen, only to get tapped on the shoulder by the police guy like, “dude, you’re blocking the live feed.” This is entertaining :)

    • Véronique Houde

      Well, she’s highjacking my 30th birthday so boo. This is my day lol!

      Just kidding.

      In all seriousness though, my labour came 3 weeks in advance so I never really got to feel that frustration at waiting for my baby to be “ready”. A storm was coming and so my boyfriend called me to ask if I could go close the folding chairs outside so they wouldn’t blow away. And then, my water broke. On my living room floor. Yup. Thank god it’s black!

      Since there was meconium in the fluid, they admitted me and we decided to just use cervadil to see if my contractions would pick up (which they did) and everything was progressing fine, but then at shift change my jerk doctor came in and decided to induce me because he was too much in a hurry, even though the baby was totally fine and I was totally fine but whatever (*bitter). After 24 hours of contractions, crying when I found out at 23 hours that I was only at 3 centimeters and then my doula screaming at the chief resident to check me right after they put in an epidural because I felt like pushing, and him arguing that it was impossible for me to have gone from 3 to 10 in half an hour, which I did, I then pushed her out in 10 minutes (with the epidural not really having kicked in) while my doctor berated me and told me that I was totally weak, not pushing hard at all, and that he was doing all of the work.

      So I’m never gonna see him again!!! ;)

      • DMH

        Uggghhh I would have kicked that dude square in the face… That pisses me off just reading about it!

      • Justme

        Happy birthday adopted sister! I’m going to highjack your highjack and let you know that my 30th is the first week of August. ;)

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter
      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        LOL THIS IS SO SCARY BUT YAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY

    • Jessie

      Oh, Eve, you should not have given me that livestream. Now I’m going to sit here ALL DAY WITH MY EYES LOCKED ONTO THAT HOSPITAL DOOR. XD

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        with meeeeee

    • Ligeia

      26 h in total for a 4.13 kg boy. It hurt. I thought it was never. going. to. end. But I had brilliant moments of comedy! I had been dreading my waters breaking in case it happened in a big gush somewhere public like supermarket aisle (my mother wisely told me to throw my big pregnant lady water bottle on the floor as cover if it did happen). It didn’t happen till I was doing the pregnant lady shuffle in the delivery suite (because they say that shaking your booty is supposed to help!?), and when the midwife came in I was standing in my giant puddle, giggling hysterically.

    • Amanda

      I had to be induced. went in on a Sunday night, started the gentle inducing drugs, progressed juuust enough by monday night to get transferred into the labor ward tuesday morning. they decided on tuesday i was taking too long so i got the hurry up drugs and an epidural (they had to try twice to put it in. epidurals in the wrong spot HURT). Eventually they told me i had a fever and baby’s heartbeat wasn’t right so if i didn’t get to 10cm in 2 hours (i was steady at 4 all afternoon) they’d do a c-section. in 2 hours i was 10 and started pushing, with the midwife on duty telling me i was pushing wrong and to do it like i had to poo.

      Eventually they decided the fever and weird baby heartbeat was dangerous so they took me into the theatre to get baby out with forceps. By the time everyone was prepped they only had to use the forceps to guide, i turned into a champion pusher. She was 10 pounds on the dot, 5 am wednesday morning, officially more than 2 weeks overdue. I then proceeded to lose almost all my blood thanks to the placenta detaching wrong. I was on the table blissfully unaware anything was really wrong until one of the docs told me i was stable. i had so many IVs in my arms i looked like a pincushion. They were nice though, while I was on the table they brought my husband’s phone in to show me her first pictures.

      Anyway, I stayed in the hospital with her until the following sunday night. My mom and my husband were with me the whole time. felt like it took forever before i could walk without holding on to something and almost 6 months later now I’m not convinced my baby girl needs a sibling.

      • Amanda

        Oo, no push present, and I wish Kate the best. Princess or not, labor sucks.

    • Jessie

      Curse it, every time that door opens I almost jump out of my seat like “OMG IS THIS IT? IS IT? IS THIS IT?!?!?!” XD;

      • Jessie

        And I’m afraid to leave my computer for fear that I’m going to miss “it.” GAH!

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        1: I keep hoping the guards will break out in dance and 2: we need a live stream of that damn royal chalkboard

      • Jessie

        RIGHT? That’s what we all REALLY want to see, haha!

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        Breaking: a bird just flew buy and one of the guard adjusted his vest

      • Jessie

        And OMG those guards are getting awfully whispery with each other.

      • Jessie

        More breaking: There appears to suddenly be a pink camera microphone and camera in the lower left of the screen. What could be stirring on this RIVETING scene of a calm street full of guards?? Stay tuned!

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        I love all the moms casually pushing prams down the middle of the street all IDGAF

      • DMH

        I wonder how many people are watching that guard… And I wonder if he’s even remotely aware of exactly how many people are staring at him. There could literally be millions. And he’s just standing there with his hands at his collar, no cares. O.o

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        A few seconds ago it was PRETTY EXCITING because he coughed — he moved hat gate really well

      • http://www.whatwouldshethink.com/ Rachelle

        You guys realize we’ll only really know once they post it officially outside of Buckingham Palace, right? Unless a nurse decides to go postal and freak the fuck out, running out of the hospital covered in blood screaming “IT’S A BLOODY PRIN—” and gets run over by the crowd.

        Just sayin.

      • Jessie

        BRITISH SECURITY GIVES NO F**KS. XD

        I mean really, have you seen those guys in front of the palace? Their faces are all ‘SRS BIZZNISS’ all the time. XD

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        HE JUST DRANK WATER

      • Jessie

        OH, OH, A FEW PEOPLE WERE JUST LET THROUGH THE GATE.

      • Jessie

        Oh and a bunch of guys in suits just went inside! AND THE CAMERA ZOOMED IN SLIGHTLY. :O

      • DMH

        OMG I SAW IT!!!11!1 This is hysterical! I don’t want to leave my office!

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        I love how he has his sleeves rolled up and the other ones don’t. we are all like two minutes away from writing royal guard dude fan fiction

      • DMH

        “He adjusted his tie and shifted from side to side, the eyes of millions of viewers weighing heavily on his vested shoulders. And silently, he thought, ‘did I turn off the coffee pot?’ “

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        YES!!!!!!!

      • Alex Lee

        “Queen and country, he kept repeating to himself. Queen and country. The royals were depending on him this time. He was all that stood between the helpless infant and the seething mob. He sipped his tactical water slowly, never breaking his gaze on the unruly simmering crowd…”

    • chickadee

      Mine can be boiled down into two words:

      Ermahgerd! Lerber!

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        You were in lerberrrrrrr!

    • That_Darn_Kat

      5.5 weeks before she was due (Sat), I had really bad pain, and thought my water broke. Went to the bathroom, turns out I had blood pouring out of me. Rushed to the hospital, where they determined I had a partial placental abruption, and was in labor. They spent 48 hours trying to stop my labor before realizing my blood pressure was higher than they wanted to see, and spent 24 hours trying to restart labor, starting on Monday. 7am Tuesday, doc comes in, pitocin isn’t working, he decides to break my water, tells me I’ll have a baby Wednesday morning. Got an epidural, but I had a hot spot so I felt all contractions in my hip. By 12:30, I told my mom I felt like I had to poo really bad, so she grabbed a nurse, who came in all like “You’re a first time mom, there’s no way you’re ready to-OMG you’re 10cm and I can feel her head! Don’t push, hold her in there until we get a resident!” Rolled me into an OR (just in case), I gave 3 pushes, she was out by 12:45, right as my doc walked into the room. She was 3lbs, 11 ozs, spent 2.5 days in the hospital before I could bring her home.

    • That_Darn_Kat

      My second one was a bit easier. Started labor, went to the hospital, they tried pitocin, which wasn’t really working (apparently, it doesn’t for me, unless my water breaks). Doc was about to send me home, and was doing one last check. She was telling me why they wouldn’t break my water, bouncing my son’s head, when my water broke. 4 hours later, my 7lb, 14 oz son was born, and we went home 24 hours later.

    • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

      IN AND OUT IN AND OUT god can’t you people keep this gate closed for three seconds?

      • Jessie

        The crowd appears to be getting antsy, lots of random cheering.

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        WHY ARE THEY CHEERING?

      • Jessie

        I DON’T KNOW BUT IT’S MAKING ME CRAZY.

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        Breaking: He briefly removed his hat. Plus, the other dudes totally copied his style and also rolled up their sleeves

      • http://www.whatwouldshethink.com/ Rachelle

        This entire thread has me in more stitches than an episiotomy.

      • Jessie

        Maybe it’s a group game of “Let’s screw with the Internet.” They all know this is being livestreamed so they just randomly cheer to make all of us think something is happening and jump in our seats. XD

    • Jessie

      Husband is demanding I cook breakfast, iPhone mode ACTIVATED.

      • DMH

        Two guys in suits walked in!! AAHHHHHH I CAN’T TAKE THIS!!!

      • Jessie

        AHHH AND NOW IT’S ZOOMED IN MORE!!!

      • Jessie

        And someone just had to show ID!

    • ksu_artist1

      Oh.. I hope she poops during labor. It will make me like her even more. I’ve only had one baby so far – 12 hours from start to finish – natural unmedicated. And no, I don’t think I deserve a medal ;) 8 lbs, 10 oz. boy!

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA she may have a royal movement whilst pushing

    • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

      oh what the eff now I can only see his shoulder

      • Jessie

        It’s zooming in, THINGS MUST BE GETTING SERIOUS.

    • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

      is that someone laughing or is it a chicken?

    • Pingback: 10 Thoughts The Guard Outside The Royal Baby Hospital Is Thinking()

    • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter
    • DMH

      WTF where’d he go??! I missed something!!!

      • Jessie

        It just zoomed in, it’s okay!

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        You can see his lovely shoulder on occasion. so wtf do they haul out the royal chalkboard when the POC arrives?

      • DMH

        It’s a female there instead :( They must have had a shift change. I thought the chalkboard was at the palace?

      • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

        we need to find the chalkboard cam!

    • Jessie

      I would also just like to take a moment to appreciate how LOVELY hospitals in London appear to be. Just look at that charming red brick walling, the frames of the windows and over the doorway with the name on it, and those lovely doors. <3

      Here in the States they're always big, white, sterile looking blocks of blah. =

    • Jessie

      Bah I have to go to bed now, stupid work is making me come in tonight. It appears I’ll miss the big show, unless the poor Duchess has a marathon labor that lasts into tomorrow (Gods forbid).

      BUT KEEP US ALL POSTED, EVE! Those of us who have to sleep are depending on you! <3

    • Alex Lee

      How many anagrams can I make out of “Lindo Wing”…

    • Hibbie

      I got an unintentional yet lasting push present courtesy of my doctor. First he had me finish the delivery after my daughter’s shoulders were clear. That was awesome. Then my very buttoned-up and conservative OB went all Rafiki on my boyfriend. He hoisted the placenta up over his head and shouted, “Look at this!” My boyfriend is still traumatized years later. When he’s really getting on my nerves, I will casually ask, “Hey, remember my placenta?” That guarantees me at least 3 hours of peace and quiet.

      Thanks, doc.

    • http://www.whatwouldshethink.com/ Rachelle

      OMG GUYS IN ENGLAND WOMEN CAN OPT FOR LAUGHING GAS INSTEAD OF EPIDURALS.

      This might sound crazy, but I think I would’ve gone for the laughing gas…

      • Rachel Sea

        They’re starting to use it here too, but it isn’t common.

      • http://www.facebook.com/RetiredSceneQueen Emmali Lucia

        Laughing gas is scary stuff. If they give you too much you can start Hallucinating. I think Hallucinations are the last thing needed when you’re having a baby.

      • http://www.whatwouldshethink.com/ Rachelle

        how trippy!!!!

      • JAN

        The half-life of nitrous oxide is only 5 minutes so at least it would be over quickly.

    • Rachel Sea

      Do you think she can hear the cheering from her room? How weird would that be.

      • http://www.whatwouldshethink.com/ Rachelle

        If I were any other mother in that wing giving birth right now, I would so Mommyjack her media and come running out Lion Kinging my new baby to all of them.

        Nachiwena bitches.

    • http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

      who are these scouting kids?

    • Jamie Wicker

      #1- Started having mild pains at around 12 am. Went to sleep. I thought it was “poop pains”. Woke up at 2 am, I GOTTA POOP. I then go to the toilet and feel down there OMG BABY, blood. Go to hospital, baby is born at 34 weeks 6 days, One push because she was already out pretty much.
      #2- Made it to 41 weeks, had to be induced. After the Pitocin started I had a baby in about an hour, with under 5 mins of pushing.

    • jsterling93

      I woke up on my first day of leave with plans to clean the house top to bottom and get some casseroles in the freezer before the baby got here. I had another couple of days till my due date but the day before my doc had said there was no sign labor would be starting soon.

      Before I even got out of bed I told my husband I felt “off.” He decided to work from home that day. An hour later the cramps started. We started timing them. When they were 5 minutes apart for over and hour we went to the hospital. I wasn’t dilated :( We went home and for the next 24 hours I walked and moaned between contractions. I bounced and I cried. It hurt.

      Finally after 30 hours of all of this I went back to hospital and begged them to do something. I was luckily at 4 cm so they admitted me and finally gave me drugs to stop the pain and to speed stuff up. After over 39 hours of contraction they told me we needed to do a c section because the baby was stuck and wasn’t going to able to pass by himself. My push present was a chocolate milkshake because I hurt so bad I threw up constantly and had not had food in over 2 days.

    • http://www.whatwouldshethink.com/ Rachelle

      Apparently their little boy was born this afternoon at 4:24. 8lbs 6oz.

    • Alex Lee

      Guy with envelope steps out and flashbulbs go crazy

      • Alex Lee

        Awesome bell guy with the proclamation

    • That_Darn_Kat

      The document has been handed off, and is making it’s way to the Palace

    • whiteroses

      My water broke at 630. I was asleep at the time. When I got to the hospital, I was in labor for eight hours and gave birth to my 10 pound 1 oz son naturally (that’s 4.5 kilos for everyone in metric). The reason? I was too far advanced for an epidural. Next time, I am getting the drugs.

      Needless to say, I was so exhausted I misspelled his name on his bassinet card.

    • http://www.facebook.com/valerisexton.jones Valeri Jones

      I went into the hospital to be induced with my son a week early because of gestational diabetes. The hospital I delivered in is an hour away from my house. I had to stop 5 times on the way there to pee. I thought the baby was just kicking me in the bladder because I would be just fine and then all of the sudden about to pee on myself. It was a little crampy, but no big deal. When I got to the hospital and they hooked me up to the monitor, I was in active labor with contractions occurring every 3 minutes on the dot. And my water had broken, but mysteriously, none had came out when I wasn’t peeing. The doctor said it was because of the way my uterus is tilted. And that me sitting down was kinda like holding it all in or something. Anyway, I wasn’t dilating or anything so they put that long rolled-up wet-rope looking thing up in me that night. They came in to give me my epidural at 3 am because I was coming up off the bed when they were trying to check me. And then at 6 they started giving me pitocin. My contractions, which had been like clockwork beforehand, got farther apart and weaker. The higher the dose, the weaker and further apart. The nurses kept telling me they had never seen anything like it. I had been in active labor and they estimated I would have had him before the doctor came in at 8 if not for the pitocin. It was like it scared the labor right out of me. And although I dilated all the way to a 9 with the pitocin, my baby wouldn’t move down into the birth canal. (Sidenote: For the little bit of sleep I got in the delivery room, I kept dreaming that my baby was reverse-drowning because there was no water in there for him. Strange.) So at about 1pm (which I would estimate meant I had been in labor for about 22 hours, considering I had the strange I-have-to-pee-NOW feelings all evening the day before), I was exhausted and my epidural seemed to be wearing off so I asked for a C-section. At 1:58, I was being sewn up on the table and my baby was swaddled up next to me, wide-eyed and looking around. He barely even cried when they pulled him out. Didn’t even cry when they gave him his hep b shot.

    • MoD

      I’m really sad for those of you with sad labor food stories. So here’s my happy food story.

      Went in around 6 a.m. to get induced, a week overdue, turned out I was already in labor. Get my water broke, get pitocin, immediately get epidural (yay!). Spend the morning listening to the unmedicated woman next door wail and scream. Neighbor finally gives birth. Eat popsicles and nap. Hungry. Get bored with popsicles. Read room service dinner menu, discover cheeseburgers. Also discover dinner service ends at 6:30. Started pushing around 4:20 in the afternoon. Pushing taking too long. Can’t tell if I’m doing it right since I can’t feel anything except one weird spot in my lower back. Want a cheeseburger. Push. Cheeseburger. Push. Baby starts to come out, and told to HOLD IT because his cord is all wrapped up on his neck. Doctor unwraps baby while I’m holding him half in/half out and holy hell, even with an epidural you can totally feel a baby hanging out in your business like that for a couple minutes.

      Finish push him out. 5:47.

      Yay! Baby! Ooh and aah. Doctor stitches me up for far too long, which means I just don’t want to know.

      Order cheeseburger at 6:25.

      Yay! Cheeseburger!

    • Tabby

      K Middy? Really? Excuse me but I just threw up.

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