If Only Child Abuse And Rape Procured The Moral Outrage That Extended Breastfeeding And Family Diaper Changing Do

child abuse and rapeThis week on Mommyish, we had two pieces that garnered quite the moral outrage.

Lisa C. Baker, who wrote candidly about her struggle to wean her 5-year-old earned her such admitted ”sanctimommyism” from one reader and many, many others. Another mother of four contributed to our Anomymous Mom column, writing that due to her family and childcare provider’s frankly awesome team efforts, she personally hasn’t changed a diaper in over six weeks. She has since been called “selfish” “a narcissist ” and been accused of “abusing her children,” all for enlisting the help of her spouse, her children, and her babysitter. The comments on both pieces continue to swell with far cruder comments. Yet in the two years that I’ve been with Mommyish, in which we daily cover the atrocities of pervasive rape and child abuse, said stories haven’t accumulated even a fraction of this animosity.

I’m emphatically not OK with this.

One of the most emotionally trying aspects of writing for Mommyish is the consistent confrontation of missing children, child abuse, and rape. A day doesn’t go by that a trio of underage girls aren’t raped and thrown down a well, that a child wasn’t stuffed into a box and left to die, that a little boy wasn’t abducted and dismembered. Amid the silly baby bump watch and celebrity post-baby body nonsense, nothing we publish can ever outweigh the gravity of these crimes, to which there are always more. More gang rape. More teen girl abduction. More serial child rapists.

In the last two weeks alone, my colleagues have penned the following headlines:

Chinese Struggle With Grief After The Strangulation Of A 2-Year-Old Girl

Grandmother Calmly Picks Up Grandchildren Before Committing Double Murder Suicide

Unbelievably Awful: Teens Murdered Two Men, Had Sex On The Bodies And Then Played Grand Theft Auto

The Latest Sexual Predator ‘Lured’ Into Arrest By Police Is A Professional Tennis Player In Florida

Jerry Sandusky Attempts Second Appeal To Overturn That Whole Raping 10 Children Thing

Serial Rapist Played Rape-Ville On Facebook With Pregnant Teens Like That Stupid Farming Game

And those are just the stories that we decided to put on our platform, discounting the many other horrific losses and violations that came across the wires. The combined comments and reactions on these pieces don’t even amount to a quarter of the intense vexation and antagonism for these two mothers. Granted, it’s the Internet. Believe me, I get the medium, especially when it comes to motherhood on the mommy blogosphere.

But in being first the deputy editor, and then the editor in chief of Mommyish, I’ve always wanted women’s stories that greatly defy motherhood mythologies to be front and center. I am not yet a mother, but my many years clocked in as a nanny and babysitter have revealed the obvious. The harmful fairy tales that accompany parenthood for women are far too ubiquitous to not go in search of those genuine voices, such as our extended breastfeeder and Anonymous Mom.

I find it deeply unsettling that women who break (primarily sexist) mommy conventions are worth more Internet slings and arrows and “[you're] a fucking cunt” than the perpetrators of the aforementioned crimes. The fact that there are more pitchforks sharpened over a mother who has an actively co-parenting partner than child rapists is not only profoundly disturbing, it’s unfortunately quite telling.

No wonder 97 percent of rapists will never spend a day jail. No wonder one in six boys and one in four girls will be sexually abused before reaching the age of 18. In a culture that is more quick to throw women who speak authentically about motherhood to the stake than those who routinely brutalize us and our children, that’s about what we can expect.

(photo: mangostock / Shutterstock)

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    • alice

      “The combined comments and reactions on these pieces don’t even amount to
      a quarter of the intense vexation and antagonism for these two mothers.”

      I wouldn’t read too much into that, or use it as a measuring stick for “what readers value.”

      the comment sections grow when there is a form of debate present. there is no debate over the horrors of child rape, murder, and abuse. there is a universal moral outrage present.

      make no mistake: we are (at least i am) reading these other articles. i’m just not commenting on all of them because i usually have nothing more to add than “this is horrible.”

      • Koa Beck

        But the fact that those stories don’t spark debate along the lines of “how can we fix/prevent this?” is also troublesome. Even when that does happen, it’s almost solidly victim blaming.

      • http://www.facebook.com/paul.white.3532507 Paul White

        I’m not of the opinion you can actually fix rape, murder, or other interpersonal violence. I think the best you can do is make them socially unacceptable, and to isolate and contain people that commit those acts. That may be pretty pessimistic, but I’m unable to conceive of a way to end those problems. *Maybe* we can reduce them, but really, society now is more peaceful than historical norms already; we’ve made huge progress. But I just can’t see a year going by without a murder in a country our size.

      • Katia

        my suggestion is reserve jail space for pedophiles/predators/ rapists to serve life – sentences. Let the drug dealers pay fines or have their assets taken away instead of spending taxpayers money feeding/keeping them in jail.

      • http://www.facebook.com/paul.white.3532507 Paul White

        I’d legalize drugs.

      • http://www.whatwouldshethink.com/ Rachelle

        At least weed. Maybe then the pedos/predators/rapists would just chill the %?& out and stay home eating Doritos.

      • alice

        I see your point. As a writer, unfortunately, a lot of this falls on you. For better or worse, if you’re looking for a meaningful debate to arise from these tragedies, it becomes your job to incite one. How can you do this? I’m sure a lot would be to take a more “open forum” approach to the article. Persuade the readers to be part of the conversation. A lot of the stories on rape and murder and just too far from the everyday experience of readers, that there’s nothing we can add to it, besides a “+1 outrage”

      • Koa

        We actually are in the process of getting Mommyish forums. More on that later, gang.

      • alice

        sounds very cool.

      • Cee

        Yay! Drinks all around!

      • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

        I LOVE all these comments so much and appreciate you guys all reading and coming out to voice your opinions. it helps us to know what you all would like to see more of and less of. PLEASE SAY MORE COURTNEY STODDEN ALL THE TIME

      • alice

        almost spit out my coffee

      • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

        hahahaha, I am still all I GIVE YOU LIIIIIIFE

      • http://www.whatwouldshethink.com/ Rachelle

        damn, I just woke up my kid loling.

      • http://www.facebook.com/houde.veronique Véronique Houde

        dude i think you should create more mommyish memes they seem to be popular ;)

      • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

        If rachel makes the memes, I will use them on all my posts!

      • chickadee

        More articles based on comments and/or awesome memes, please. I like the idea that responses to posts prompt new posts and new discussions.

      • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

        You guys know you are always welcome to submit to Anonymous mom too, right? and if you ever want one of the writers to cover something I think all of us would be thrilled to hear suggestions.

      • Cee

        I’d like to read articles about people in the educational field that are not molesters, parents with children with special needs, parents with teenage issues, parents raising lgbtq children, lgbtq parents, or a parent who has one of those tweens that is a Justin Bieber fan that threatens people all over the internet.

        Scratch that. Forget my self righteous wants….I want the last one!

      • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

        We totally need more special needs and LBGT kids posts agreed

      • LiteBrite

        Oh I know. I actually have an Anonymous Mom story. I’m just afraid of the moral outrage it would incite.

      • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

        DO EEEEEET! I love your comments so I would love reading a piece by you, plus, you would be anonymous anyway

      • Koa Beck

        You got it, chickadee

      • http://www.whatwouldshethink.com/ Rachelle

        *dead* She’s Crazy Level: Ninja.

      • http://www.facebook.com/houde.veronique Véronique Houde

        only if you promise to cover courtney at LEAST once a week. and get her to follow you on twitter.

      • chickadee

        Part of the problem is the presentation. When the author writes barely a page on an event and most of that page is quoted from someone else’s longer and better account, how invested can we get in your article? Especially when (in the case of the grandmother who murdered her grandchildren) your author doesn’t bother to read the source material correctly. It feels like it’s an obligatory moral outrage post.

      • alice

        right, that’s another factor. and i’m not blaming the mommyish authors, bc as far as i’m concerned, their *value* to readers isn’t to “report the news.”

        but in many cases, these articles we’re talking about are just that: news reports.

        and i would wager that the “horrible news reports” on mommyish get about the same volume of comments as the “fluffy news reports”

        it’s not an indicator of strength or quality of readership. it’s just that we can see the difference between an AP News Headline and a personal article.

      • chickadee

        Right–I don’t see Mommyish as a newsbreaker, so there shouldn’t be that much difficulty understanding why we don’t engage with short news links. If you use the news as a springboard for discussing causes or reactions by enlarging upon the issue and linking it to greater questions, then we might get a discussion going. Most of the time I don’t comment since all I could say was ‘how horrible.’

      • Tinyfaeri

        What chickadee said. I personally come here for entertainment and parenting stories, I get my news from news sites and organizations and channels. If all I can say about something is “that’s terrble” most of the time I don’t bother because as someone else pointed out, it just sounds trite at that point.

      • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

        It’s interesting because we do cover a lot of fluff too, and I always whine to Koa “who reads these Kardashian stories, why do we have to write them?” and um, you guys read them, a lot. I would assume people like more personal essays, but a lot of time Kim K gets more traffic. it’s interesting!

      • chickadee

        Eve, I have to confess that I ignore the celeb articles. Even yours…. :’(

      • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

        *cries* But I always add excellent anecdotes about doing laundry to them!

      • chickadee

        Because you are honest. And we appreciate that you let us in on that. Please stop crying. It makes me deeply uneasy.

      • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

        HA!

      • alice

        i love the fluff mixed in. especially if it’s *snarky fluff* <– so tasty, once a day.

      • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

        see Alice, I think you may be the only person who comments on my personal celeb fluff. hahah

      • Amanda

        For the record, I never read teh Kardashian stories, and the personal essays are by far my favorite. Just putting it out there…

      • once upon a time

        Yep. If the author can’t put in the effort to present something original and interesting, why should we bother commenting?

      • Kati

        Maybe you could write and article aboutthis ? Title: how can we prevent atrocities?
        Ps i rarely click on those horror articles because icant afford to depress myself.
        After years i had to quit checking cnn because i am not strong enough to read about the horrible crimes that are so common. My husband suggested this. Im just too sensitive/ weak.

      • Justme

        I don’t equate being sensitive with being weak. I am the same way – I have to walk out of the room on the ASPCA commercials. But it’s not because I’m ‘weak’ but instead because I’ve got a huge heart and want to rescue every single animal.

      • lea

        Thank you for saying this, Justme. I get sick and tired of seeing people labelled “weak” or “not as brave” or whatever when something bothers them that doesn’t bother other people.

      • chickadee

        Well, also the bitching on the diaper-changing post was more or less a couple of people with multiple Disqus personalities, right?

      • alice

        truth, imo

      • Sara

        I scrolled to the comments in order to write almost exactly this. I don’t think it’s a reflection on the level of outrage that these stories inspire; it’s just that when it comes to the rape and murder of children, not only is there no debate to be had, but any comment that might be made often seems trite.

      • alice

        precisely. it’s like when you scroll to the comments section of Yahoo News Articles on the same tragic topics. It’s a bunch of crap. 14665 “thumbs up” sympathy posts, 5400 “This wouldn’t have happened back in my day,” and 2000 Obama-hate posts, apropos of nothing.

      • whiteroses

        This. Nobody debates that these are horrible occurrences, and that the people who do these things are horrible people.

      • http://www.facebook.com/courtney.wooten Courtney Lynn

        I definitely think this is the reason. And I totally agree that it is the same reason I do not comment as much on such posts. It’s horrible and we all think so. I feel like I don’t have a whole lot to add other than to be a drop in the sea of “How terrible”. It’s not that nobody is outraged. It’s that we all are.

    • Amber

      If only people would stop dismissing emotional abuse because at least the kid isn’t getting raped or beaten, maybe I wouldn’t have spent a childhood in hell.

      • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

        It’s a very valid and awful and real thing, I hear ya.

      • Nyx

        I agree with you Amber. Emotional abuse is a real issue, and it often leaves deep scares that cannot be seen. But having your child change the occasional nappy (as part of a loving and functional household) is not by any stretch of the imagination abuse. Throwing out evocative words like abuse belittles the very real, very painful abuse that you (and I) and so many others have gone through.

        I sorry you spent your childhood in hell. So did I, but I survived, and it looks like you did too. *hugs*

        But anyone who thinks I’m ‘abusing’ my child by not relishing in the amazing bonding experience of poop patrol, or by eventually getting her to help out with the household (or any future siblings) can damn well say it to my face.

    • chickadee

      I think the difference lies in the presentation. When people post first-person narratives about their experiences and what they’ve done, they are implicitly saying, ‘here it is. discuss.’ They give out a personal perspective and readers talk back in the comments. In your other stories, quite often it is a summary of a crime and a tagline about how awful it is.* There’s not much to do there but agree and move on to read about the issue in more detail somewhere else.

      If you posted a story about abuse or rape from the perpetrator’s perspective, you better believe you’d get a lively discussion. I’ve seen that happen when a victim of such crimes writes about their experiences. A personal narrative speaks to readers in a way that exerpts from other sites’ news stories do not.

      *I except Eve’s coverage of the Steubenville horror, since she was thorough in her research and analysis.

      • http://www.facebook.com/paul.white.3532507 Paul White

        And some of the Stubenville stories did get a lot of comments IIRC too. Those were well researched and pretty well written articles, and got attention and debate.

      • Koa

        Yeah, Eve is aces.

        Some of our staff have actually written about their own rapes — from a first person perspective — and those stories haven’t invited nearly the same amount of outrage as extended breastfeeding and Anon Mom: http://www.mommyish.com/2012/10/24/richard-mourdock-pregnancy-rape-abortion-122/

      • chickadee

        Hmmmm. I did not see that, but let me say that Ms. Cross was incredibly brave to write that letter and post it. The Anon Mom articles sort or encourage vigorous debate by the very nature of their anonymity. It’s easier to be honest with someone behind a screen, as it were, than with someone who has a name and an identity.

      • LiteBrite

        I think in the case of Ms Cross’ article, once again, there isn’t much else you can say except “How horrible!” and “I’m so sorry.” I do remember that article and I read it but didn’t have anything more valuable to say than those two phrases.

        I’ve noticed that the more comments an article has, the more it tends to attract other commenters, especially if trolls are involved. Unfortunately this means that an article like the most recent Anonymous Mom one are going to get a lot of reads and comments while others, like ones about child abuse, are not. So, it’s a double-edged sword. But it doesn’t mean people aren’t reading them or don’t care about the topic.

      • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

        Thank you so much! I feel like we are all sort of going through Steubenville together because so many of you all care so much about this case and are so knowledgeable about it. I know that reading the comments and yammering back and forth has helped me a LOT in writing about it because it’s such a hard and awful thing in many ways, and with the trial coming up it should be once again difficult. But it really does help having you all reading and commenting about it. For me as a mom it’s been a doozy.

    • Eileen

      In all fairness to readers, the articles you mention on breastfeeding and diapers were firsthand perspectives. I.e. we know that the person doing the extended breastfeeding and not changing the diapers was likely going to see our comments. Jerry Sandusky? The murderer of that poor little girl? The grandmother? They’re definitely not here. Not to mention, none of those stories is primary reporting. We’re likely reading those stories, if not the particular articles, elsewhere. Breastfeeding mom and no-diapers mom are stories exclusive to this website.

    • Cee

      As someone that works with children, I am horrified when I read
      about rape, murder and child abuse, as a mandated reporter, I have known
      many students who were victims of abuse and finding out about it in the
      schools I work for or observe is very very heart breaking and soul
      shattering. Reading about it, and worse like in the case of murder makes
      it even worse. I do read the stories, I just have nothing to say cuz no
      words can convey what I think, feel and picture (what if this were one
      of my students, child relatives…sad sad last moments for such a child,
      children should not have to know these atrocities and so on).

      Sometimes motherhood is a self congratulatory pissing contest, and we all know rape, murder and child abuse is wrong, no one is going to argue about that and I doubt and sincerely hope no mother here is doing any of those things with their child. But, they are feeding, weaning, changing diapers (or not!), and racing to each milestone. Everyone feels differently about those things and feel the need to validate their choice and judge anybody who does not fit into their perceived notions as to what a mother is..

      • AP

        A lot of it, too, is a false sense of protection. Our society’s gut reaction to bad things happening to children is “Where were the parents?” and the belief that parents can stop bad things from happening to their kids if they are just careful enough.

        So when something bad happens to a child, they go after the victim’s or youthful perpetrator’s parents for failing to protect the child. Then, they reassure themselves that “it will never happen to MY kid” because I “(insert parenting method here.)”

        “Oh, Timmy was molested by his Boy Scout leader? Well, I knew his mom wasn’t careful about him when she switched to formula when her maternity leave ended.”

      • Cee

        Yes! All of this! Its as if the parent was going to stop a bullet, stop the drunk driver from slamming into their car, knew their uncle was molesting their child and so on. Its the belief (however truly it is the hope) that it will not happen to them.
        As someone who has reported or sat in child abuse cases, they are so unique. While I try to numb myself on the abuse part, how it came to be, who did it, the child’s home situation are always different. It happens just under parent’s noses and they don’t even know it. And the dumb shit people, particularly mothers say like your last little quote about Timmy makes me so mad because its almost as if it trivializes the situation. Yea..so fuck them and whatever happen to them, its all about you and your correct parenting choices, right? Ugh, humans.

      • whiteroses

        Exactly. I agree with this.
        I also think that part of it is that the personal stories (and the most recent Jane Pratt article, because omg the crazy is strong in some of those comments) are things that I connect with. Some of these stories- I take them personally, and they’re all beyond my comprehension. I don’t comment because what on earth can I add to that? I don’t know what it’s like to be a woman who loses her children because of their grandmother (small example there). I do, however, know what it’s like to be an overwhelmed mom. I know what it’s like to be a woman bombarded with a skewed version of what beauty is.

      • http://www.facebook.com/houde.veronique Véronique Houde

        I feel the same way. I am on maternity leave from a similar job to yours, and don’t even click on these articles because it’s one thing working and being immersed with these issues every day – i don’t need to take them home with me… I would much prefer joking around about the fact that this afternoon, I intentionally did NOT change my daughter’s stinkiest ever diaper (we started giving her solids two weeks ago) so that my boyfriend got to enjoy the stench too. PLEEEEASE tell me I’m a bad mom!!!

      • Blueathena623

        I agree with this. I don’t have the vocabulary to respond to those articles. For the most part I can’t express how sad and angry those incidents make me, so instead of leaving a lame “that’s so horrible!” I keep quiet and hug my kid.

    • Kim Lewis

      A-fucking-men, sister. Women, especially mommies, should be banding together to support our diverse choices. Yes, choices. Choices go along with “free country”. You don’t get a free country without choice.

      • AP

        The fact that anyone downvoted this comment illustrates the author’s point perfectly.

    • chickadee

      (posted reply in wrong place)

    • Rachelle

      Being one of the self-described sanctimommies who voiced an opinion on Lisa’s post (and then spent an evening learning and changing my mind about extended breastfeeding, so thank you for that), I want to highlight that her post asked a question, “How do I stop?” – so we answered. It also pitted us against our own personal belief systems as mothers, which, let’s face it is very easy to fall into. Some people just LOVE rubbing your face in their “Mommy Level: Boss” status.

      I’m horrified by rape, violence, guns, abuse… it often leaves me speechless, and I don’t always want to read about it – it’s much more fun to read about boobs and diapers sometimes. But if Mommyish becomes a space for mothers to use their quick tongues to voice their opinions on concrete matters, I’m positive that you as editors and writers can guide us there.

      Push us beyond our conventions, make us think, open the conversation rather than lead towards a close-ended judgement. I’d love to see that happen.

      • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

        am asking Koa if we can get MOMMY LEVEL:BOSS STATUS T-shirts made

      • http://www.whatwouldshethink.com/ Rachelle

        Like I said. Send me one of each. lol

      • Koa Beck

        That along with Mommy Fight Club.

      • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

        and magical vagina.
        (I love our readers)

      • lea

        “and then spent an evening learning and changing my mind about extended breastfeeding, so thank you for that”

        It takes a pretty awesome kind of person to do this (challenge their own views on anything), and then say so. *slow claps*

    • Justme

      I love this website because I feel the writers, editors and commentators are a bit more progressive in their perception of parent and motherhood are and should be. Most of the time, it’s NOT a competition for the “perfect” mother and measuring yourself up against an impossible set of prescribed standards.

      I honestly feel that most people here are laid back and reasonable….and that’s why I think that Anonymom column garnered so much attention. It wasn’t necessarily the topic (because most regulars here can agree – sweet ninja skills Mom!) but instead the INSANE responses (Really? Checking over your husband’s shoulder at the diapers he is changing? Yikes.) that garnered the attention. It was like our (mostly) peaceful little village of sane and realistic women-who-happen-to-be-mothers got taken over by Mombies hell bent on sucking any semblance of a pre-baby soul out of our bodies.

      But here’s the thing….I think ALL people can agree that rape, child molestation and endangerment of all kind is pretty horrific….regardless of where each individual stands on the topic of extended breastfeeding or family distribution of labor.

    • AS

      I think there aren’t as many comments because frankly it is terrifying. Child rape and murder is not 100% under any of our control. People (especially mothers) do not want to think about it. The way we go about feeding our children (for the most part) and changing diapers are within our realm of control, we know what it feels like and therefore feel like we can offer opinions; these are subjects we feel comfortable discussing (criticizing). Since becoming a mother, it is rare that I even read an article about child murder/rape. As a recent article was discussing new mother “day-mares”, reading about things like that only fuel fears as likely or unlikely as they may be. And in the event that I do read about it, I typically try to block it out immediately and absolutely don’t put it up for discussion. It is the way I protect myself.

      • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

        I think this is so interesting. I can remember when I had one of my kids, my sister dragged me to a new horror movie and afterwards I was SO upset because all I wanted was like clean, happy, cheerful sweet media and I can remember getting so upset over bad news stories and sad stuff going on in the world. and now my kids are a bit bigger so I get super rabid and pay a lot of attention to the bad stuff going on in the world, maybe because of my kids being older and everything not seeming so fragile (in my life) right now? I do see your point though.

      • sparklesmcgee

        I’d like to ask why those horror stories are published here at all. This site is so much about setting moms free from the unfair cultural pressure on mothers. But the perpetuation of the myth that our children are constantly in danger of unspeakable atrocities is just loading more unfair cultural pressure on us. Crime rates are actually falling in most developed countries. Safety standards are increasing. Our kids are safer than any previous generation in recent history. Making us all paranoid is feeding the same bullshit monster that this website sets out to free us from.

    • chickadee

      Posted in the wrong place again.

    • lin

      When everyone is morally outraged there isn’t much to say. The comment section would just a be a bunch of “this is so terrible” comments. There isn’t really much to add when everyone is agreeing with each other and clearly the crimes are horrific. The extended breasfeeding one was different – people disagreed with the the author – hence the comments. Really makes a lot of sense. People do have strong opinions on the matter, but that doesn’t mean they are more opposed to a 5 year old breastfeeding than a 5 year old being raped.

    • Iris

      Everyone is against rape, abuse, neglect, sex slavery and all that. We all agree there. No suprise there. People love to argue over petty things. If we all side together on the real issues then the rest really doesn’t matter.

    • akinermom

      THANK YOU! I cannot believe some of the things women say to each other in the comment feeds. I read Anon mom article and thought how fantastic this family is. They work hard to get everything done together. Yes, the title kind of implies some neglect, but the first paragraph clears that right up. People need to remember… yes, this is the internet, and the person you are being an asshat to can’t reach over and slap you, but that doesn’t mean it’s okay to say the meanest thing you can think of. Time for people to remember Thumper’s rule… if you can’t say nothing nice, don’t say nothing at all”

    • Ummmnope

      If this is the type of CRAP that the editor-in-chief at Mommyish is putting out, it’s time to move onto a new blog. There’s no debate about rape and abuse being wrong, so there isn’t going to be the same amount of comments. It’s sounds like Ms. Beck is butthurt, not concerned about rape and abuse.

    • raero

      No wonder 97 percent of rapists will never spend a day jail. No wonder one in six boys and one in four girls will be sexually abused before reaching the age of 18. In a culture that is more quick to throw women who speak authentically about motherhood to the stake than those who routinely brutalize us and our children, that’s about what we can expect.

      I sincerely hope you are not implying that the lack of comments on a recycled article on an internet blog are the reason that rapists are not jailed.

      As everyone else has said, these articles are simply relaying the horrible facts, while the others are opinion pieces. Opinion invites debate, facts invite repetitive declarations of “this is awful, I hate it.” It’s really that simple. Chill out.

    • once upon a time

      ‘Granted, it’s the Internet. Believe me, I get the medium, especially when it comes to motherhood on the mommy blogosphere.’

      I really don’t think you do.

    • http://www.facebook.com/courtney.wooten Courtney Lynn

      I see what you’re saying, but I think it’s easier to find conflict in diapering and breastfeeding than it is in rape and abuse simply because most everyone is equally outraged about the latter.

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    • Fek Yew

      This website is just trash. All the “news” is just emotionally charged speculation that has absolutely no value. Honestly, i realize that raising children takes a lot of time, but for the love of god, find a viable news source instead of being one of the mindless inbreds who would accept the ENQUIRER (or at least this site) as a legitimate news outlet.

    • keelhaulrose

      I work with another website, one that deals almost exclusively in horrifying human situations. Ones that no good person would agree with, and that many people can barely stomach. With new postings often come a sudden rush of horror, in posts condemning perpetrators, expressing sympathy for the victims, and occasionally wishes for swift justice or vengeance. With no like button, sometimes there are dozens of these posts before people stop posting or move on. The only thing that gets attention back to the comments are trolls.

      It’s not that we’re not horrified at one thing over another. We’re horrified by everything that gets posted. But after a while the comments reflect our feelings and desires enough to feel no need to further post.
      That said, in a website such as this that doesn’t have the same standards for posting (we are willing to let people dream up rather creative punishments, it’s their way of coping, and most of our visitors are victims or family of victims) perhaps people’s feelings are best cast by clicking the like button (something we lack) and quiet reflection.