The word “sanctimommy” has become popularized in recent years due to the fact that more parents are indulging in their “sassy side.” You know how success is often defined as “luck meets hard work”? Well, sanctimommies can be defined as “good intentions meets condescension.” I truly believe that some sanctimommies are not purely out for themselves, as the name implies, but rather think they’re being helpful, or educational, or not annoying. Sadly, most of the time sanctimommies are the opposite of those things, but they just don’t know it. Part of me pities them, but the other part wishes it wasn’t so passĂ© to tell people to their face (or their avatar) that they’re being smug or even hurtful.
Since it is rude, though, I tend to receive a LOT of Sanctimommy submissions for the blog, and every time I ask readers what their favorite categories are, they list Sanctimommy in the top three. We’ve all dealt with sanctimommies, whether at work, at family functions, or at a birthday party for a 1-year-old. They’re like a virus. Whenever you least expect it, a sanctimommy shall appear.
With that in mind, I wanted to identify different types of sanctimommies for today’s column. There are many varieties out there, especially on social media, but for today, we’ll take a look at just five. Here they are in no particular order of self-righteousness:
1. The Hyperbolic Sanctimommy
We’ve already seen several examples of what not to say to your child-free friend, but what about parents who post simple quotes like this about how great it is to have kids? Trinity was just posting a quote that resonates with her in order to share her feelings with her friends. Nothing wrong with that, right? Well, I guess, if you’re the type who thinks that saying “you haven’t lived until you have a child” is inoffensive. But to those people who don’t want kids, can’t have kids, or are struggling to have kids, it’s actually incredibly demeaning — something I’m guessing Trinity didn’t think (or care) about.