Yesterday the lovely and talented Miss Lindsay Cross wrote about how she felt the new study out about not telling your kids about your past drug use is bogus and I totally agree, mainly because I have made that mistake with my own kids so many times. I am always talking about drugs with my eldest son who is 16, and I know his younger siblings have overheard these conversations. I just always sort of assumed yeah, my kids WILL do drugs and no matter how mumsy I get with my view on them doing drugs it won’t matter anyway.
I’m not suggesting my kids will be doing lines of coke on their Algebra books or stealing my Blu-Ray player to hock to buy some rock (see what I did there?) but I guess I just sort of assume that at some point, between the ages of 15 and 40, they may get high. Now, I do not really want them to get high, but I also don’t want them to get married or have sex or move out of my house either. I know that there are many parents and people out in this world who have never touched a drug (My ex-husband is one of them) and I would like to think that my own kids won’t either, but the simple fact is they probably will. So when one of them asks me about a drug, I’m always the mom who is like “Well, some people like pot, a lot of people, but for me it always made me really hungry and then super sleepy so for me it just wasn’t the best drug ever, I have always been more into drugs that make you sort of speedy and have more energy and….”
And then I realize what I am saying and I STFU.
I worry about what pot does to your brain cells, and this is where you lovely readers can throw me all sort of statistics on how pot doesn’t really harm your brain, but then I also worry a fuckton about what alcoholism does to your sanity cells due to a family history of alcoholism, so for me it’s sort of a toss-up. I tell all my kids that they have brains and bodies that are still growing and that I really don’t want them doing drugs, but I especially never want them driving while doing drugs or getting in a car with someone who has been doing drugs, or drinking. And I warn them about how sometimes if you smoke pot that it can be laced with something other than pot, and that can be a very dangerous thing and can totally mess them up. And how some drugs can do even worse things to them.
I haven’t done drugs of any sort (except for some bitchin’ pain pills after my hysterectomy) since I was 19-years-old. I can remember ditching class with my friends and getting stoned behind the school dumpster. I also had excellent grades and went on to go to college when I was still in high-school. So even though I don’t want my kids to do drugs, well, at least until they have moved out of my house and I don’t have to know about it, I’ve just always assumed being open with them about it was the best thing.
Even though pot isn’t the drug for me, I know plenty of amazingly successful and smart adults who still get high on occasion. I worry about my kids getting high and getting busted for possession or getting some dusted weed or using weed as a gateway drug to some super expensive and dangerous coke addiction, but I don’t worry about being honest with them about these things. I don’t glamorize my past experimentations, but I don’t hide them from my kid either. I just always assumed hearing from me honestly about the pros and cons of getting stoned was better than hearing from one of their friends that it is the best thing ever.