New mommy Gisele Bündchen is reportedly hanging around Hawaii these days with her 9-week-old daughter, Vivian Lake Brady, and a little something else. The only other attribute that could bring the paparazzi from far and wide aside from a celebrity birth. The post-baby body! And in a bikini! Snap snap snap!
People magazine has snaps of the Brazilian supermodel strolling about in a black bikini, shades, and a wide-brimmed hat. No plugs for particular diets, post-baby body products, or clothing lines appear to be in sight. (Points!!) The publication describes the mother as “displaying her washboard stomach” and, as is fairly standard phrasing as the rags go, “showing off her post-baby body.”
Because the only reason to go with your family to the tropics — or rather the top priority with a newborn in tow — is to showcase that Post-Baby Body. Stir up some mom envy nationwide with not only a gorgeous baby but a “washboard stomach.”
Tell me, is one still “showing off her post-baby body” as they wipe up diaper blowouts in said bikini? What about breastfeeding under a cabana while also wearing a bathing suit? Or hypothetically talking down 3-year-old Benjamin (Vivian’s brother) from a level nine tantrum on the beach? Is a bathing suit really the only ingredient?
If so, the next post-baby celebrity mommy beach headline I want to see is “Gisele Bündchen Shows Off Her Post-Baby Body While Cleaning Up Diaper Blow Out.”