shutterstock_51659029Sometimes you wake up on a Sunday morning in a grumpy mood and you see something that makes everything better. Fox News used a photo of the first same-sex couple to ever marry atop the Empire State Building to illustrate the importance of heteronormativity for one of Suzanne Venker‘s uninspired, pathetic rants about how feminism is destroying us all. And for the brief shining moment that they kept it up – all was right with the world.

Gawker was quick on the case and published a screenshot of the of the original article. The image shows Lela McArthur and Stephanie Figarelle sharing a beautiful first kiss as a legal married couple. Fox News has since taken it down, of course. If you waste the two minutes it takes to read the article accompanying it you’ll know why.

The article is titled, “To Be Happy, We Must Admit Women and Men Aren’t Equal.” It’s a follow up to her equally offensive articles, “The War On Men” and “Let’s Call A Truce In the War On Men.” No, I’m not making these titles up. Her basic premise is that we would all be much happier if we decided we didn’t want equal rights and just got the hell back into the kitchen where we belong, damnit! Feminists are basically ruining marriage by deciding they don’t want to stay in unfulfilling unions and driving the divorce rates right through the roof.

Marriage becomes a competitive sport. The complementary nature of marriage—in which two people work together, as equals, toward the same goal but with an appreciation for the qualities each gender brings to the table—has been obliterated. Today, husbands and wives are locked in a battle about whom does more on the home front and how they’re going to get everything done. That’s not a marriage. That’s war.

Right, so women should just stop complaining and be tethered to their homes and husbands like they were in the good old days.

The battle of the sexes is over. And guess what? No one won. Why not try something else on for size? Like this: men and women are equal, but different. They’ve each been blessed with amazing and unique qualities that they bring to the table. Isn’t it time we stopped fussing about who brought what and simply enjoy the feast?

Well, these women are trying “something else on for size” – each other. Is that what you meant, Venker?

I didn’t think so.

(photo: Arcady/ Shutterstock.com)