• Mon, Jan 28 2013

The 10 Most Awkward Mom-To-Mom Conversations

young loveThis afternoon, I get to talk to a mother whose son is apparently in love with my daughter. He’s so in love, he’s stealing his mom’s jewelry to woo over my 5-year-old. So now, this momma and I have to sit down and discuss what to do about our affectionate kindergartners. And let me tell you, I just can’t wait!

This upcoming conversation got me thinking about all of the awkward talks I’ve had, and will soon be having, with other mothers. From playdate drama to tween social issues, our moms have a lot of time to haltingly attempt not to offend each other while discussing our offspring.

As our kids make friends at school and extra curricular activities, we get to meet all kinds of parents that we’re just expected to get along with. We all sit around the same gym waiting for practice to end. We all make idle chit-chat over greasy pizza at birthday parties. And we try not to say anything that will make another parent upset. Sometimes, we just can’t avoid a weird and tense run-in.

So we at Mommyish put together a list of the most cringe-inducing mom drama. Make sure to let us know if we forgot your favorite bit of passive-aggressive mommy chatter.

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  • Cest la vie

    A million times yes on number nine. That will happen until your child is well out of college. I’ve had a parent tell me that my daughter was a bad influence to her child, when my daughter had no idea who the kid was! But there’s worse things on earth than having an honor-roll student that’s rumored to be the “wildest kid in school”

  • Mandee

    UGH. I had to have a “hey, your kid was trying to molest my kid” talk with a woman who’s child I was babysitting. That was definitely the most awkward talk I’ve ever had with anyone. Anyone.

  • Blooming_Babies

    Ha number nine! My wild child best friend was the bad influence… But her mother was sure it was me. Not looking forward to some of these inevitable joys.

  • meg

    Kids are kids. Sometimes they jump off of chairs or slip chasing a soccer ball, and sometimes arms get broken in the normal course of life. I’m not sure it’s fair to Monday morning quarterback someone else’s parenting and ask that they pay for your child’s medical bills, unless they are the DIRECT CAUSE of injury (like, the parent pushed them off the swing or something.)

    • MrsAshley

      Yea, I agree.

  • http://www.facebook.com/helen.donovan.31 Helen Donovan

    They all seem pretty icky EXCEPT the one they choose to headline. In first grade my brother and a little girl in his class got “engaged” (ring from the gumball machine back in the day when the cost a penny). While I understand the concern of jewelry theft, is their “love” such a big deal? Perhaps kids are more precocious now, but is their really a concern that they are going to have make-out (do they still use that term?) sessions or start grabbing each others asses? (I think there may have been some hand-holding in my brother’s case).

  • http://sarahhollowell.com/ Sarah Hollowell

    I homeschooled with two other girls through middle school for a year until, out of the blue, the mother of the other two girls (who had become my best friends) emailed my mother and told her that we were no longer welcome. No warning, just, “Your daughter seems to be depressed and she’s a bad influence on our daughters. Don’t come back.” It made my mother cry and pretty well screwed me up, too.

    One of the girls came to my high school and we were friends for a little while, until her mother found out and forbade her from seeing me. The other friend and I had to sneak around to hang out because her mother hated me so much.

    It’s now been almost ten years, and that mother that hated me? Yeah. Still trying to keep me away from her daughter. We’re in our early twenties and she made my friend cut off contact with me entirely, threatening to kick her out if she didn’t follow that rule among many others.

    But the thing I’ve really never forgiven them for? Contacting my mother, who had worked with them to educate us for a year, in such a cold, out of the blue way, and making her feel like *she* didn’t belong and that she was a bad mother.

    • Lisa

      This happened when I was in high school; sort of, but not quite. We had a friend who’s parents thought she was the queen all, be all. Everything that we got caught doing was because, according to her parents, we were bad influences. At one point we tried to tell her parents that she was out of control, constantly trying to get us to try various drugs, having sex with random guys, etc. Her parents flipped out, called my parents, & told them how awful a person I was & how it’s all my parent’s fault that I was such a horrendous teenager, a bad influence on their daughter, & I was never to associate with her again.

      Fast forward 6 years & I ran into her father while I was working (as a full time store manager & going to college). Her dad basically broke down to me that they were now divorced, the daughter got so out of control that she had a baby addicted to meth (they don’t know the father), & she kept popping in & out of their lives whenever she needed money. As justifying as it is(& I’m not proud to admit that), it’s also sad. If they hadn’t been so blind, & had listened when we tried to tell them the truth, she would probably be a well rounded, participating member of society. Instead she’s a burden to anyone who comes in contact with her.

      I hope you don’t feel bad for other parents being blind & stubborn. Sheltering kids & pointing fingers at others (& the way they raise their kids) may be done out of love for a child, but it’s not the kind of love that a child really needs. Just continue to do for yourself, make your mom proud, & keep your head high. :)

  • LiteBrite

    My four-year-old niece is rather aggressive, and for awhile she had a particular fondness for going after the boys in her class. One day my sister and a new co-worker were talking, and they discovered they lived close to each other and had kids in the same daycare.

    Co-worker: “Wait, is your daughter [insert first name, insert last name]?”
    Sis: “Yup.”
    Co-worker: “Oh, she’s the one who’s been beating up my son.”

    Awkward.

    (Just a note, my sister and the daycare worked together to find other outlets for niece’s excessive energy. Niece has since gotten a lot better, except she still wrestles with my five-year-old son….and wins.)

    • LindsayCross

      Your niece and my daughter would probably get along REALLY well!

  • Not That Rebecca

    Yeah, unless said kid already attends your church, you don’t take someone else’s kid to a religious service without their parents’ explicit permission. I would have thought that was obvious. Ugh.

  • Ava

    Please, for god’s sake, the word is “yours,” not “your’s”! I think we all should have learned this around second grade. I love this blog but the atrocious grammar is so distracting. You’re writing a blog post, not a facebook update, so use spellcheck if you need it!

  • Hana

    I remember parents getting involved in adolescent drama being very awkward. One mom would confront another saying “your daughter broke my son’s heart!” all the while I’m thinking “we’re in the 7th grade calm down!”

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