Our winter break has been lovely. Holidays and birthdays have been celebrated, the house is officially undecorated, the ham is gone from the refrigerator. My children have been enjoying their Christmas gift books but haven’t had any homework assignments until I received this email a few days ago. The letter started out innocently enough:
Hope everyone is having a restful break! If you are bored, or your child is, I might have a solution! When we come back from break we are going to be starting our big government chapter. This involves branches of government, levels of government, as well as the Preamble.
And then stated how it would be most helpful if my child had memorized the preamble to the constitution using the Schoolhouse Rock video, that so many of us are familiar with because we grew up with it.
Now is it stuck in your brain like it is stuck in my brain, forever? I swear, we have listened to this hundreds of times. All of my children are walking around my house singing it nonstop. I catch myself humming it while doing housework. This song is officially the soundtrack to my life now. I know it’s important that kids learn about history and are prepared to get back into the swing of things when they are back from break but I swear, if I have to hear this one more time I’m going to collapse in a pile of goo on the floor or else forbid anyone in my family from ever speaking of the constitution again.
It could have been much worse. We could have received an assignment to build a volcano or construct a diorama of the signing of the constitution or something, but Schoolhouse Rock is now officially ruined for me. I used to think it was cute, charming and retro kitschy but now it makes my ears bleed. I know I could have just made my kid memorize the actual preamble, but his teacher said that she uses the Schoolhouse Rock version so we should familiarize our kids using that one.
And oh boy, are we ever familiar.