Itās not that I donāt agree with kids getting Hanukkah gifts or Christmas gifts, because letās face it, for children, itās all about the gifts. I am slightly mortified by all the cost that goes into buying these gifts, which in my opinion is way too many.Ā But my biggest problem with gifts is that while it takes only 30 seconds to rip open the presents, it takes mommy and daddy FOUR hours to unwrap the packaging.
For example, I had two familyĀ HanukkahĀ parties, one on Saturday and one on Sunday. The first was with my family, where my daughter, son and stepchildren each received eight presents. The next day, we went to my fiancĆ©ās sisterās house, where again, each child received eight gifts from all the family members. Thatās 64 gifts we had to load in our trunk and then unload into the house. And they were good gifts.
But even my daughterās Monster High Dolls took me 15 minutes to open and unwind all the wiring that holds the pieces in place.Ā I feel like saying to manufacturers, āHey, itās great that you care so much that a toddler canāt get into the gift, but you do know that even us ADULTS canāt open them either!ā And donāt even get me started on my babyās toys. He got a lot of trucks, some sort of aquarium thing that lights up, and other battery-operated gifts. So, first the knives and scissors come out so that we can open the box. And then it takes us at least 20 minutes to unwind all the wiring that attaches all the pieces to the box. After that, I need a nap.
But, anyway, the process is not over. Because after youāve used your knives and scissors and get the darn gift out, you realize that ā duh! ā you need 18 batteries (which you donāt have) to make the toys make sounds and move and do what they are supposed to do. And, of course, they arenāt just double A’s. They are usually some sort of special battery, and all youāre thinking is, āI just spent hours at parties. Iām tired. Iāll get the batteries another time.ā And then you realize that not only do you need batteries, you need a little screwdriver to open the part where you put the batteries in.
Honestly, the best gift anyone could give me this season is one of those little screwdrivers that opens the place where you have to put the batteries in, because I know we have one somewhere, but of course I have no idea where. Also, while I appreciate that manufacturers are trying to be as safe as possible, all those wirings end up on the floor and my dog could eat those (because heās not the smartest dog) or my baby could (because heās not the smartest baby, but thatās because heās a baby.)
Nevermind the paper cuts I seem to get while ripping open these cardboard boxes. I suggest that when you buy toys that need batteries and screwdrivers and hours to take out of their boxes, one should also throw in a scissors, the batteries that are needed, the mini screwdriver that is needed, a few Band-Aids for parents who get paper cuts, and also a box of garbage bags for all the crap that surrounds these toys.
Getting presents are fun. Unwrapping them is fun. But, actually opening the damn things? Not so fun. Thatās why, even though we received 64 gifts for our kids, only a handful have been actually opened to use.
These days, opening presents and getting them out of a box is a full-time job. I canāt do math very well, but letās say 30 of the gifts required mommy and daddy to unwind all the wires, find batteries, the screw driver, and make the darn things work. Let’s say it would take an estimated 15 minutes for each, which is practically a full day’s worth of work.
Please, Santa. All I want for Christmas is an easy to open gift. Or a mini screwdriver. Iāve been (mostly) a good girl. Thanks.