• Fri, Oct 19 2012

Nightline Wants You To Share Your Post-Baby Weight Sob Story With Them

New mom weight loss seems like it is the only thing the media cares about when it comes to baby news. No matter if you are a celebrity or a soccer mom, the pressure to get your “post-baby body back” is something that is shoved down the throats of new moms on a never-ending basis. Not surprisingly, I find this entire conversation bullshit.

Are you a new mom who can’t seem to lose your post-baby weight? Have you tried everything and don’t know what you’re doing wrong? If so, you may want to tell Nightline about it, and they may be able to help you.

From ABC News:

“Nightline” is looking for new moms to share their weight-loss story and allow us to film their daily lifestyle. If chosen, we will may bring in a personal master instructor/celebrity trainer to help identify your blind spots — the problem areas in your life you are looking to change, and locating the changes when you’re not looking. The simple things that could potentially have huge results.

Or, if you are a new mom and you are sick and tired of being stressed about your post-baby body and reading about every celebrity being able to fit into their skinny jeans five seconds after giving birth, tell Mommyish! We won’t help you at all! We will simply commiserate that losing weight after giving birth is a bitch and probably offer you cupcakes. We here at Mommyish realize the entire world is telling you that unless you are at your pre-pregnancy weight before you’ve even figured out to work the Diaper Genie that you are a failure as a woman. We are here to tell you that unless your doctor is expressing concern about your weight, you are probably just fine.

Being a new mom is hard. Losing weight is hard. You should try and eat as many vegetables as you can. You should sleep as often as possible. You should try and nap when the baby naps, and drink enough water, and take nice, long walks when you feel like you are up for it. You should accept any support offered to you. You should eat something that you love that may not be entirely “healthy” on occasion. You should spend countless hours just admitting your newborn’s tiny little hands and feet. You should never feel like you have to panic about losing any weight you gained just because another celebrity is being featured in the news for her “hot post-pregnancy body.”

The only time you should ever worry about your size if if after doing a thorough medical exam your doctor feels like your weight is a health issue. If you find yourself depressed about your body after giving birth, unable to find joy in your day-to-day existence because you haven’t lost your baby weight, you should work in conjunction with a doctor, nutritionist, and/or therapist in order to come to term with your feelings and lose weight in a healthy way. But only if you want to.

Your body has changed. It doesn’t matter if this is your first baby or your fifth. There are so many factors that contribute to losing weight, and at the end of the day, the only thing that really matters is your health. What size your jeans are is not a conclusive indicator of how healthy you are. And what size your jeans are doesn’t determine how attractive you are as a woman and mother. In addition to what I’ve deemed the Frumpy Mom Revolution, I also want to start another revolution where moms are a hell of a lot nicer to themselves, to each other, about how they look physically as moms.

I’m not an expert at any of this. I’ve caught myself mentally beating myself up numerous times over my appearance, the size of my hips, brand new wrinkles that seem to appear on my face every ten minutes, how dumb my hair looks sometimes. But I’m trying to get better about it. I’m amazingly lucky. I have a husband who loves me and still finds me hot. I have happy, healthy kids who make my stomach hurt with how much they make me laugh every day. I have a home to live in, clean water to drink, and a refrigerator with food in it. Whenever I catch myself berating myself over the fact I don’t look like Beyonce I remember these things.

This conversation doesn’t just apply to new mom weight loss, but old mom weight loss as well. I don’t know you, but I bet you are beautiful in at least a hundred ways. I don’t care how much you weigh, what size you wear, whether or not you are a frumpy mom or a MILF or somewhere in-between. We owe it to ourselves and each other, as women, as moms, as humans, to shift the focus from how hot we are on the outside to how hot we are on the inside.

(photo: Ruth Black/shutterstock)

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  • http://twitter.com/ithinkUshould xobolaji

    eve, you’re so delightful! xo!

    • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

      No, you are!!! xoxoxo

  • aileen_t

    I still use the I just had a baby excuse. No one needs to know she’s 6.

    • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

      My baby just turned 8 today and I used the same excuse, bwahaha

    • http://www.facebook.com/RetiredSceneQueen Emmali Lucia

      I use the “Just had a baby” excuse, too. When I’m at the ultra trendy gym I go to that’s filled with trophy wives with plastic parts. And I haven’t even had children.

  • Meghan

    Yes, yes, yes!

  • Heather

    After my first baby, I was at my pre-pregnancy weight within a week, below it by 2 weeks. I thought “wow… and people say it’s so hard!”. Then my second baby came along 2 years after my first. Let’s just say, it wasn’t pretty. A year later, I’m sort of down to my pre-pregnancy weight, but not my pre-pregancy um, shape. I’m embracing my muffin top because I’ll be damned if I can figure out how to get rid of it!! It’s hard sometimes to accept that I can’t control my shape but at the end of the day, I’ve had two kids, I’m in my late 30s, I work full-time and I spend my “free time” with my kids. Mabye if I worked out for 2 hours a day on my weekends, I could get rid of my extra roll, but my priority is my kids. I’ll get rid of the roll once they leave home. So take that, Beyonce!

    • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

      Yes!

  • Rebecca

    So I’m brewing creature #3 right now, just about 6 months along. With all 3 of my kids I started out at a size 10, but I can’t fit into any of my old maternity clothes this time! I feel HUGE already and I’m a little panicked that I won’t be able to get the weight off this time. And I have to buy new maternity clothes which sucks.

    • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

      We need to find you someone to swap with! There has to be a place pregnant women can swap and share maternity clothes!

    • CW

      Unfortunately, I got *WAAAAAAY* bigger with #3 and it was quite a bit harder to take off the weight after she was born, even though I had gained exactly the same # of lbs. as with #2. The last 5 lbs. did finally come off right around her 1st birthday, but I keep yo-yoing because any time I let things slip even a little, it comes right back on. That never happened after #1 and #2.

  • Peggy

    Thank you Eve…just thank you.

    • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

      xo, anytime.

  • C.J,

    It took me a year and a half to lose the weight after my first. Just in time to get pregnant with the second. It tool 2 years to lose the weight for the second, actually I wigh 10 lbs less than I did before having kids. Now if someone could just tell me how to put everything back where it used to be I’d be all good. It’s been 7 and a half years since I had a baby and I still can’t figure that one out.