Sex, Love and Applesauce explores the complexities of maintaining a healthy relationship with your partner while the majority of your focus and energy are being devoted to parenthood. So hold on to your matrimony and buckle those car seats.
Don’t you hate it when you and your partner have an argument that escalates into a full-blown fight and you don’t talk much for the next three days and all that time you’re trying to remember what the hell you fought about? Man, I really hate that. It makes me feel stupid and childish and unevolved – and yet, oh-so-human.
It happened recently when my husband returned home from a five-day-long work trip. Nothing major or out of the ordinary went down while he was away. We spoke on the phone a few times and texted a bunch. Totally normal stuff. But then, when he got home, we were suddenly fighting. There was no shouting or even a lot of talking, there was just the stench of disharmony hanging in the air. I could tell he felt it too, but neither one of us wanted to be the first to call it out for fear that we’d also have to apologize.
But apologize for what? I couldn’t pinpoint where things had gone off the rails or what he’d done that I was so pissed about. Somewhere, at some point in the past 24 hours, something had made me angry and now here I was, unable to recall what it was and unwilling to let it go.
This got me thinking about all the asinine reasons we fight with our life partner. There are countless valid reasons to disagree and air things out, but I have a hunch that the majority of those annoying rows and raging rumbles arise for one of the following reasons.