• Thu, Oct 4 - 11:00 am ET

Congratulations Perfect Parents! I Think You’re Lying

perfect parentsI ran into a friend on the street a couple weeks ago.  She was strolling her toddler, and he was wearing a bright red Elmo cap.  When my son saw it, he started to chuckle.

He loves Elmo, I said.  It’s his favorite part of “Sesame Street.”

You let your child watch TV? She replied.  My son has never seen TV.  He doesn’t know who Elmo is.  He just likes the hat.  You know, it’s really bad for kids under the age of two to watch ANY TV at all.  It causes autism.

Um, what?  Was she seriously implying that because my kid watches an hour of Sesame Street in the morning, he would somehow become autistic?  Yes, she was.

I had ideas about the type of parent I would be before I actually had a child.  We all do.  I was definitely in the children should never watch TV oh my god what lazy parenting camp.  Now – not so much.

Sesame Street comes on at  seven a.m.  This happens to be about a half hour after my son wakes up, and right around the time my pot of coffee is finished brewing.  Do you know those things you like to do in the morning – drinking coffee, checking your email, and reading the news?  It turns out that after you have a child, you still want to participate in this morning ritual.  Can you imagine?

To me, this programming situation is win-win.  My son is entertained for an hour looking at numbers and letters, and I am drinking my coffee in peace, answering emails and writing.  I’m sure that some people will judge me for this, but go ahead.  I’m just being honest.  I’m pretty sure that I am not the only mother who allows her toddler be entertained by Elmo.  Before I welcome the guilt-tripping landslide of negative feedback that I might get by admitting this, let me be very clear.  He gets Sesame Street in the morning, and a half hour of Pocoyo when it comes on at three p.m.  That is all.   He dances around and laughs and loves it.

Now, back to the friend that felt it was necessary and appropriate to imply that I was damaging my child by doing this.  She has full-time daycare.  She also has a maid.  So yes, her comments pissed me off.  She has no idea what it is like to need that hour and a half desperately.   If I had full-time childcare, I would be in her camp, too.  I’m not going to pay someone to entertain my child with TV.  But guess what, to those of us who don’t have the money for help – sometimes the TV is the help.  Horror of horrors!  It happens.

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You can reach this post's author, Maria Guido, on twitter.
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  • NeuroNerd

    Maria, you are hilarious.
    Also, I don’t have kids, but I was a kid fairly recently (I’m 23). Didn’t we all have sugar in our birthday cakes? I think we all turned out ok…

  • Justme

    I get the general concept that you’re trying to put out there but I think you seem to do it in a very defensive manner.

    No. My child doesn’t watch television when she’s at home with us. She doesn’t know who Elmo is. She also doesn’t drink apple juice (or any other kind of juice for that matter). And yes, my daughter eats peas, green beans and zucchini at dinnertime.

    But it’s not because my husband and I are these fastidious, OCD “perfect” parents who try to lord it over everyone else.

    It’s because I’ve put kid shows on the TV and she’s just not interested. She’d rather play with her stuffed animals, chase the dogs around the house or “read” her books.

    It’s because I’ve given her sips of juice to try out and she gags – she prefers water and milk.

    It’s because I put the vegetables on her plate to see what happens and guess what…my daughter is a hungry, hungry hippo and will eat practically anything you put on her plate.

    I know how lucky I got with that last one, trust me.

    Of course there are some parents out there that seem to go out of their way to make sure everyone knows how “amazing” they are….but from my experience those kinds of mothers are few and far between. Most moms are just going about their business and raising their children the best way they know how.

    I guess I understand where you’re coming from but your delivery makes it seem like you kind of have a rather large chip on your shoulder.

    • alice

      i’d have a chip on my shoulder too if some bitch told me that my son was going to develop autism because he watched sesame street. MEOW! :)

    • Justme

      But don’t you have to kind of consider the source and brush that stuff off your shoulders? That kind of thinking is so asinine and preposterous that it doesn’t even deserve a second thought. It’s just flat out wrong so why get all bent out of shape about it?

    • alice

      I see what you’re saying. I don’t feel like she was too aggressive in the article, and it DID display a thoughtful juxtaposition between sanctimommy berating her for tv-watching and then hypocrite/sanctimommy feeding her son a giant frosted cruller. :)

      there’s definitely something to be said for people (not just moms) who so strongly parade and parrot certain ideals to others, who vociferously judge others, only to fall short themselves. (as we all fall short).

      a friend of mine recently scoffed at another mom: “you let him eat a FRENCH FRY? HA! i’m NEVER letting my son eat fries”

      you just wish you had a tape recorder for these moments, so you could play it back years later.

    • Justme

      The only time I’ve come across mothers like that are on the internet.

      Except for my sister-in-law….she says things like that. But she’s her own brand of crazy so I just ignore her.

    • bumbler

      I agree, I think this thing only happens online, exaggerated in mother’s imaginations, and perhaps among the very wealthy. I have literally never heard one scoff from another parent, and I am proudly friends with a large diversity of parents (not just people like me). I’d only ever put up a fuss about something if someone was trying to do it to MY kid. Like, give her juice, because we don’t give her juice. My sister gives her kids a popsicle right before bed time (after brushing the teeth). Whacky, right? Well whatever, they’re her kids and her dental bills, lmao.

    • Justme

      Exactly. There are tons of things that my SIL and brother do with their children that I don’t necessarily agree with but at the end of the day….it’s THEIR kids and THEIR decisions. Can she be an absolute pompous jerk about her completely “superior” parenting choices. Yep. Most definitely. But for me to become defensive, annoyed, frustrated and angry at her over it would do me no good whatsoever. She’s not going to change and it’s not my job to try to change her. I smile and nod, politely end the conversation and move to a different activity far from her BS. I simply refuse to let her overbearing-ness determine how I feel about my parenting choices. Let the ass holes be ass holes…you can only control how you react to them.

    • http://www.facebook.com/helen.donovan.31 Helen Donovan

      You must have some great friends, but the sanctimomies do exist in real life. I don’t have kids but many friends who do (ranging from 1 kid to 4) and I can’t believe what I hear from them. They are not SAHMs so maybe that makes them more likely targets, (only a guess on my part, they never said so) but they are a pretty level headed bunch. All of them “know” this type of MOMMY and refer to them as the “Mommy Mafia.”

    • Justme

      I’ve run across one. My SIL. And I most certainly do not call her a friend. Is it so hard to believe that someone chooses not to have nasty people in their lives that say condescending things to their so-called “friends?”

    • http://www.facebook.com/houde.veronique Véronique Houde

      I would probably find her so galling and ridiculous for saying that that I’d start laughing in front of her, tell her good day and walk off with my kid, and probably not see much of her again ;)

    • LiteBrite

      I agree the author seemed a little defensive about this. However, I think it’s hard not to get defensive when another parent shoves their perfection in your face. I’d be pretty pissed off if another parent said to me what they said to the author about TV watching.

      But yeah, those parents are few and far between, and most of them are only found on the Internet I bet. I know I don’t know any in real life. A friend of ours does not let her three boys watch TV. Once a week they are allowed to watch a kid video, but that’s it. Not once has she ever thrown it in any of our faces though about TV watching. She just raises her boys the way she sees fit, and we all raise our children the way we see fit.

      There is a book I want to read: “I Was a Great Mom Until I Had Kids.” That sounds right up my alley.

      Oh and can we trade kids for a day? :) My son is ultra picky about food (he gets that from his father). I feel like screaming some days, “Just freaking eat it!”

    • Justme

      She does love to eat….that’s the one thing I am most grateful for. But on the flip side she didn’t really become a consistent sleeper until a few months ago (and she’s almost 19 months) and she STILL won’t ever sleep past 7:00 in the morning. So….I guess it’s all a trade off, I suppose.

      And I agree that the woman (or man) that said a child could become autistic through watching television was out of line. But it’s also so completely false that I wouldn’t take the source of the information seriously, you know? I would just walk away thinking “man, that person is an idiot.” And then go on with my day.

    • LiteBrite

      I probably wouldn’t throw down either if someone said that to me. (I’d be tempted though!) I’d just do what you would do, shake my head and think “Idiots abound.” (Oh, and I’d tell my husband about it too so we could shake our heads together.)

      And once again, we need to trade kids. On weekends, the boy STILL is up at 6 a.m. Usually my husband gets up with him because I’m impossible when I miss my eight hours, but I just feel like asking the kid, “Dude, seriously?”

    • Justme

      Don’t worry….sleeping until 7:00 is a relatively new trick. All summer when we had the time off (we teach) my daughter would wake up between 5:30 and 5:45. My husband would get up with her until 7:30 or so and then we’d switch spots and he would go back to bed while I played kitchen or read books with her for an hour and a half. It served our family well but it was still kind of a beating.

    • Andrea

      An old grandmother once told me that when it comes to babies/toddlers you can have a good sleeper or a good either but you won’t have both. She said it was God’s way of reminding you of the imperfections of this world. I laughed, but I think she had a point! LOL

    • Andrea

      That would be EATER not either.

    • http://www.facebook.com/helen.donovan.31 Helen Donovan

      I love it, but sometimes it just evens out among the family. I was a poor eater and sleeper. Many years later when my brother came along he was a perfect eater and sleeper. Go figure.

    • LinZoo

      The problem is not people who say they make their own baby food or don’t let their kids watch TV, it’s people who let you know that if you don’t do the same thing, you clearly don’t care about your child.

    • Justme

      I wholeheartedly concur.

    • http://www.facebook.com/courtney.wooten Courtney Lynn

      Exactly. They want to hit you where it hurts. We all love our babies and we just need to realize that just because someone does it differently, that doesn’t make it wrong.

    • Justme

      Maybe they are insecure and need to validate the way they raise their children. People behave in certain ways for a number of reasons, none of which we can control. But regardless of how THEY act or behave you can’t let it affect your day or your emotions.

    • http://www.facebook.com/courtney.wooten Courtney Lynn

      And sometimes people need to vent. That is all.

    • Justme

      Okay.

    • Justme

      But I also think that those people are completely insecure thus feeding the need to show everyone how and why their way is far superior. I just smile and nod and then raise my daughter how I see fit.

    • http://www.facebook.com/courtney.wooten Courtney Lynn

      There’s a difference in what you’re telling us and then bragging about what a better parent you are because of it. So, yes, I would be annoyed and defensive, too if someone was being condescending about my parenting style while going on about how great they are.

    • Justme

      Then don’t be around those people. Just end the conversation (or the friendship if necessary) and surround yourself with people who are supportive and helpful not condescending and superior. And if it’s a random person at a party…someone who isn’t part of your inner circle then who cares what they have to say?
      The only time it really sucks when people do this is when they are a part of your family. My sister-in-law is the holier than thou mother martyr and I learned a long time ago that I just “can’t compete” with her (at least in her mind). So I don’t. I let her raise her sons and I raise my daughter and we co-exist when needbe. I ignore what she says about parenting because I know it just doesn’t fit into our families needs.
      Sometimes you have to grow a thicker skin on stuff like this.

    • http://www.facebook.com/courtney.wooten Courtney Lynn

      Well, I’m glad you have such a “thick skin” and can impeccably pick out those who are supportive and helpful. Sorry, but sometimes you do have to wade through BS to find the gold and it’s not unusual to get pissed off along the way nor should someone be shamed for it. We’re human.

    • Justme

      I’m not shaming anyone. And I wasn’t born with a thick skin – I had to learn how to shrug things off. I had a friend who was exactly like this – superior on everything and I got tired of it and realized that she just wasn’t someone I wanted to spend time with. If someone is continually berating your lifestyle choices then why on Earth would you want to be around them? The fact of the matter is that there are ass holes out there that say really stupid stuff. All the time. We’ve all even been those ass holes at times. But at the end of the day the only people whose opinions matter are those that live in your home and are directly affected by your choices. I just couldn’t relate to how angry and frustrated the author seemed in this article. You don’t have to get so defensive over how I choose to view the world.

    • http://www.facebook.com/courtney.wooten Courtney Lynn

      It seems like you’re getting defensive that she’s getting defensive. Sometimes things people say bother us. Who are you to tell someone how to feel? So it doesn’t bother you, great. It bothers the author.

    • Justme

      Oh Lordy. I’m not telling anyone how to feel but I am saying that you can save yourself a lot of frustration and heartburn if you learn to worry about what is in your control and what isn’t.

    • http://www.facebook.com/courtney.wooten Courtney Lynn

      You can but some people aren’t quite there yet.

  • meah

    I 100% agree with you. Anyone who feels the need to tell you how perfect they are, is really desperately trying to convince themselves. It’s insecurity, plain and simple. And they are soooooooooo lying! :)

    PS My grandmother was my childcare provider for the first few years of my life, and I watched Sesame Street, Mr. Dress-up and then her “stories”(!) every day. I turned out pretty well, if I do say so myself. So, sip on that coffee, put up your feet, and try not to let Elmo’s grating voice ruin your relaxing time!

    • MommyK

      My dayhome lady did the same thing. We watched Mr. Rogers, Mr. Dressup, had lunch, then soap operas (well, she sat and watched them while we pretended to play while actually watching them, my favorite was Another World). I turned out alright.

    • Nancy

      I feel like I actually learned a lot from TV when I was a kid. It introduced me to activities and ideas I wouldn’t have thought of otherwise. Mr. Dress-up got me majorly into crafts and drawing, which I still do. And lots of shows showed me how there are lots of people all over the world with completely different lifestyles. The Magic School Bus taught me a lot of science, and superhero shows taught me that you can stand up for yourself. TV in and of itself is not bad, as long as you have parents who take the time to explain things, help you with homework and encourage your interests. Everything is about balance!

    • Nancy

      Then again, we didn’t have internet and I only had the original nintendo at that point, so I also played outside and used my imagination a lot, too. But yeah, still BALANCE

    • ipsedixit010

      I agree! I credit Sesame Street and Reading Rainbow for helping cultivate my love of reading at an young age. I would ALWAYS ask my mom to take me to the library to get the new books LeVar was highlighting.

      Butterfly in the skyyyy, I can fly twice as high!

    • GPMeg

      Ohemgee, me, too! When my brother was 4 we had home care (a nanny, sorta) for after school for a while and every day, we’d come home and she’d help us make our snacks and then while we were eating them? Guiding Light. Bored the shit out of me, so I’d go find a book!

  • mrsbrown128

    My son is watching Cat in the Hat as I sit here and write this. I was the same as you before I had kids… I would never let the TV babysit my kids! But you know what? Being a work-at-home mom, there is only so much I can do without letting him enjoy some child-friendly programming. I’m not proud of it, but it is what it is.

  • Mamma Joy

    You don’t need to defend yourself for letting your child watch Sesame Street. If more kids — not to mention adults — watched Sesame Street, maybe we would all know how to share, count, read, and tolerate people who are different from us.

    • goofyjj

      At least the kid isn’t watching “Jersey shore” or “kardashians”. I know parents like that – and then they wonder where little braidyn gets her ideas……

  • Rebecca

    I have a relative like this. She works 6 days a week and I’m a sahm. She can’t let a visit go by without making snarky comments. My son has a social anxiety disorder. According to her it’s because he was never put in daycare, never mind that his pediatrician said daycare would just make him more anxious at that stage. That was about 2 years ago and he’s like a different kid now:) my kids are both tall for their age. Of course she assumes I’m feeding them non-organic milk (the horror!) which I wasn’t but that’s beside the point. My son had a bad run last summer where he just kept getting sick which sent her on a breastfeeding tirade. I didn’t even bother correcting her that I did in fact, breastfeed. We used to be close but now that we’re parents I’m glad I only see her once or twice a year

    • http://twitter.com/mariaguido Guerrilla Mom

      Oh, don’t even get me started on the daycare lectures I get. My child isn’t in daycare, but we do spend a lot of time at the park and try really hard to make more and more play dates. Thank God you don’t live too close to her!

    • LinZoo

      You get lectures for NOT putting your kid in daycare? I thought it would be the other way around. I guess people can judge you for just about anything. I think daycare is great, and I’m sure my kid is missing out on a lot of socialization skills, but she’s also almost 9 months old and has never had an illness. My friends’ babies who go to daycare are sick all the time. But I’m not judging them for that, they don’t have a choice, either. I’m just saying there’s a positive and negative aspect to almost anything you do.

    • http://www.facebook.com/houde.veronique Véronique Houde

      At nine months, developmentally, she doesn’t need socialization skills because she is not a social being. The one person important to your child is mommy right now so don’t worry about daycare. When she’s 2, it’s a whole other ballgame! It has been proven time and time again scientifically that infants in daycare show higher levels of cortisone (which indicate stress). I understand the need for daycare, so if you need to send your child, it’s great that it’s there because having a stressed-out family would be worse for the kid! But for now, if she’s with you, then awesome :)

  • LinZoo

    I have a friend who says things like that and I don’t think she means to be hurtful. It might help to playfully point out the implication of what your friend says, because it is kind of ridiculous. Put on a big smile and say, “Well, CLEARLY, I do not care about my child!” I mean, maybe your friend isn’t like that, but in my case I think it made it easy for both of us to laugh and brush it off. It made it easier for me, at least. :P

  • bumbler

    Let me help you out. Write these down on a card and keep them handy: “You’re wrong.” “I disagree.” “STFU.” “Whatever.” “LMAO” After using these a few times you can put on your very own pair of big girl mommy panties and move on with life, because people say stupid things ALL. THE. TIME. About everything and anything. I realize the author of this article gets paid to dramatize and whine about inane things, but I thought it might be helpful to clarify for any other real people who might fall into her victimized track of thinking. Think I’m a jerk? You can use any of the above comments to write me off too! See, that’s how good they are, hahahah

  • kathleen

    Maybe the author does sound a bit defensive, but honestly the holier-than-thou parent is nobody’s friend and does make you want to punch him or her in the jeans.

    Television is a tool — it’s all in how you use it. And good for you, not whomping that mother with her pastry hypocrisy.

  • aileen_t

    What I’ve learned in my 6+ years of parenting is no matter what you do there is always going to be someone to tell you you’re wrong and screwing up your kid. Now I kind of want a doughnut. Or some cake REAL CAKE!!!

  • katia

    haha
    you missed out on some cake, agave nectar does not taste bad its just pricey
    i freaking hate when ppl go on about the stuff they are serving and how special it is at their kids party. wow bad manners. i have a friend like this and shes like it about everything, (“dont you love the gift i got ur kid”, etc) its getting pretty awkward/annoying!
    to the tv/ autism lady:
    “óh really? you should wikipedia that” but yeah shes insensitive, and/or flaunting her lavish lifestyle passive aggressively

    • LinZoo

      I know, right? Let your cake speak for itself! I like to bring dirt cake to a party. Everybody comments on it and they eat the hell out of it and ask me for the recipe. And it’s full of butter and cream cheese.

    • LinZoo

      (and oreos)

    • http://www.facebook.com/courtney.wooten Courtney Lynn

      I have a friend like that, too. For my “bachelorette” (which wasn’t much of one because I was already pregnant so it consisted of going to dinner) she made me a cake. Very nice. Well, she felt the need to go on about how it was made with coconut oil and so much better for you and how poorly we all eat. Then when I was REALLY showing and we got pizza for lunch she told me that when SHE gets pregnant, she plans to eat as healthy as possible. I don’t talk to her much anymore.

  • Anon

    She isn’t your friend if she pulls the sanctimommy routine! And she is lying or her nanny is letting the kid watch tv

    • LinZoo

      I know, right, will she get a shock the day her kid learns to say Elmo? “He just likes the hat…” Or maybe he knows who Elmo is!

  • C.J.

    Usually the ones that think they are perfect and don’t acknowledge that as parents we all make mistakes are the ones that have the most problems with parenting. They are either too blind to see it or are trying to make themselves feel better about their choices. When my older daughter was small I had someone go on and on about how terrible it is that people let their kids wear tank tops and halter tops in the summer. Don’t you know if a 2 year old wears clothes like that they will turn into a slut when they are older! My daughter was playing with her daughter and of coarse had on a halter top. They cover everything except the top of the back. My daughter has eczema and would get horrible heat rashes at the top of her back (thankfully she has grown out of that). With the halter tops she didn’t get them as much. She looks at my daughter and says “she has a skin condition so I guess it is ok for her”. There where quite a few comments like that from this person. I just considered the source and ignored it. Not much you can do about people like that.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Shelly-Lloyd/826469442 Shelly Lloyd

    We never watched tv, and my son still developed autism. So your friend can STFU.

  • goofyjj

    That woman is the worst kind of mom. Trying to shame others in public with the “my kid never watches tv or eats sugar” when behind closed doors he’s probably watching tv 12 hours a day while eating twinkies for breakfast. Or something similar….

    nothing wrong with Sesame Street or the occasional cupcake.

  • Ellie

    Sesame Street rocks! My kids love it, just as I did.

  • notorious

    I know someone like this. When I didn’t completely cut out soda while I was pregnant – and mind you, Im not a huge soda drinker – I mainly just drink it when I eat at a restaurant. I don’t even keep it in my house… this woman said to me “I guess I just love my baby enough to not get him addicted to caffeine in utero”. As if my child was going to come out going through withdrawals and wanting Pepsi in his bottle. I just laughed in her face.

    • Taargus

      I got that all the time when I was pregnant. I loved my caffeine so I looked up the guidelines for the “safe” daily allotment given by the March of Dimes and I stuck to that amount (or less). I drank water the rest of the time. I figured since I quit smoking as soon as I got pregnant, I could allow myself some small amounts of caffeine.

    • TheHappyPappy

      That woman is a total… Grrr, I won’t finish that sentence. She wins the Sanctimommy prize, that’s for sure.

      I’m reading a devastating book right now about Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder. One of the cases they mentioned involved FASD twins who had 12 children between the two of them, all with varying degrees of disability due to prenatal drug and alcohol exposure. And that just one story in a whole book of them! And this twit is ragging on you for drinking soda!

      Just for the record, you dear ladies can be reassured that caffeine is not considered a teratogen (meaning something which is known to harm a developing fetus) so you were really being harassed for no good reason.

  • http://www.facebook.com/heavenstomurgatroydexitstageleft Chris Meichtry

    I can definitely relate to this. I’ve been running into a lot of parents just like that while rallying against the filth that Nick Jr. has decided to air during our dinnertime (stuff that makes Real Housewives look tame). People in support of NickMom are telling me what a bad parent I am because while I supposedly let my son stew in front of the TV 24/7 as it babysits him (their assumption), they would NEVER let their child watch TV and their kids are ALWAYS in bed by 7 PM. Bullshit. They’re obviously liars because even the most perfect child isn’t THAT perfect. And regardless of that, I really don’t think I’m a bad parent because I let my kid watch Yo Gabba Gabba during dinner each night. Aside from the time I spend cooking said dinner, I watch it with him and we practice counting and repeating the words and lessons. Sure, too much TV is bad, but it has been a great learning tool…that is, until Nick Jr. decided to replace my son’s shows with vulgar adults-only programming.

  • Kate4423

    My ex-best friend turned into “crazy mom” when she had kids. The “Look! No sugar!!” mom. The make-my-own-baby-food mom. The breast-feed-until-4 mom. She completely changed once she had her first child. Me? I’m very laid back. Sure, I have restrictions on my kids – no pop (unless we’re at a restaurant), no sweets (unless its a celebration) – but that’s really it. When it came to playing, my son (15 months younger than her son) was jumping off of the toddler slide in my backyard (he was 18-months at the time). Her son, at 3, got on the 1st step of the toddler slide, looked back at her and started crying for her help. To each their own….I guess.

    She was very judgmental of me & my parenting – and I really didn’t give a shit. It eventually was one of the causes of our friendship falling apart, which is sad. But I am not going to tolerate someone who is trying to “one-up” my parenting by trying to make me feel guilty. You can’t make me feel guilty. I friggin’ ROCK as a mom. Just as my sugared-up kids.

  • workingMOM

    your friend is a jerk.
    i had a friend like that – when i told her that i was pregnant, her immediate reaction was “how are you going to afford it?”. needless to say, she is no longer my best friend (or friend at all).
    in situations like these, i find it best to respond with class and a subtle hint of sarcasm, i.e. “oh, yes,you’re probably right. thanks for pointing that out. you know, why doesn’t my son come to your place and your nanny can show him other ways to entertain himself?”
    you might be met with the old “well then you shouldn’t have had kids”, garbage.
    you know, pre-pregnancy, my cousins were adamant about how nannies are the most irresponsible parenting thing EVER and that, if you couldn’t handle a child on your own, then you shouldn’t have one. Both have been through two nannies respectively.
    people need to concern themselves with their own kids – little sally might seem like the perfect child to her mommy, but, in reality, she’s sneaking pills from the medicine cabinet and selling them to the other fifth-graders so that she can buy booze and makeup.
    give your kid freedom and educate him on moderation. educate him on what’s right (sesame street) and what’s wrong (the kardashians, jersey shore, this new amish business, etc.), and he’ll turn out to be a perfectly fine and responsible young man.
    best of luck!

  • http://avatarsankh.blogspot.com/ Xyzzy

    Your friend is more than a bit of a nitwit — if watching Sesame Street made people autistic, I wouldn’t have had to wait so long to meet others like me. Besides, as an autie raised to be proud rather than ashamed of my differences and given all of the love, acceptance, and encouragement to grow/exist the way nature designed me to that a non-autie kid would have, I’m perfectly happy being autistic. (Parents with Down Syndrome kids can best explain the line between helping disabled kids with real problems vs. trying to normalize them.)

  • http://www.facebook.com/lauren.esmon Lauren Kamikazepenguin Esmon

    I’m 24, my brother is almost 21, and we watched TV, played video games, ate sugar (well, I did, my brother was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes when he was 11, so he’s been off the stuff for awhile), and read Harry Potter and we came out great. I was in the gifted program, went to a boarding school for the gifted, graduated from college, and have a job. I have Aspergers but ive still managed to thrive and function and i doubt i have it because i watched Barney. He is an accomplished graphic designer and artist, is in college, has a job, and healthy social life. It’s how you guide and shape your children, your influence, rather than what you forbid them to do.