Just In Time For Back To School, Urban Outfitters Is Selling Booze T-Shirts To Our Teens

Like us parents of teenagers don’t have enough to worry about in regard to underage boozing, Urban Outfitters has released a line of pro-drinking T-shirts that our kids can wear while raiding their parent’s liquor cabinets. The T-shirts, ranging in price from $24-$29, are emblazoned with slogans such as “ I Vote For Vodka” and ” I Drink You’re Cute” — because, get it? If you are wasted then you have poor judgement and people are always cuter when you’re shitfaced.

Before anyone whines at me about how Urban Outfitters is for college students, a lot who are over the legal drinking age, I am a mom to a teenager and guess where he wanted to go back-to-school shopping? Urban Outfitters. With brands like Kill City, Obey and Converseit has the type of clothing a lot of our under-21-year-old kids like wearing. And you can’t tell me that a store that also carries super cool Kid Robot figures and bacon frosting isn’t a place most teenagers wouldn’t dig shopping at.

Urban Outfitters should make some super hipster new t’s for our teenagers to wear! I am happy to suggest the following super cool slogans!

Almost Every 90 Seconds, A Person is Injured In A Drunk Driving Crash!

Teen Alcohol Use Kills About 6000 People Each Year, More Than All Illegal Drugs Combined!

Teens Who Have Had Five Or More Drinks Were Three Times Less Likely To Use Condoms Than Other Teens!

Nearly 40 Percent Of High School Boys Said It Is Acceptable To Force Sex If A Girl Is Drunk!

I love booze. I love nothing more than a nice fizzy cocktail or a glass of a slutty red wine with dinner, but I am a grownup. I’ve been of legal drinking age almost half of my life and I know my limits, and I know I personally hate nothing more than a hangover and having to get up the next morning and take care of kids and work. So I am very careful about my alcohol consumption. Most teenagers aren’t, and do they really need T-shirts glorifying alcohol use when most of them aren’t even old enough to consume alcohol, much less know how to consume it? Unlike the threat of walrus sex, alcohol use amongst kids and teens is something that is a real problem in this country, and Urban Outfitters should be called out for their new line of stupid booze T-shirts.

(Photo: Urban Outfitters)

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  • Lawcat

    I’m going to whine and say that Urban Outfitters isn’t for teenagers. :) They might like the stuff, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s geared for them.

    • Jessie

      Agreed. That’s like saying stores like Victoria’s Secret shouldn’t sell the sexier adult lingerie they sell just because someone’s teen daughter might like buying her bras there… Well, that doesn’t mean the store is actually MEANT for your teen to shop there!
      Also, what happened to just telling the kid “no?” My mother would tell me I wasn’t allowed to shop at certain stores all the time, at least not when it was on her dime, and as the child I had no place to argue. What’s a teenager going to do? Throw themselves on the ground and have a hissy fit like a toddler if mom says no? The worst that could happen is them going back to the mall alone and shopping there with their allowance or summer job money, really. In which case, if the parent catches them wearing something inappropriate then they ACT LIKE A PARENT and take it away.

    • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

      Oh I agree with you. I love the word NO. My kid wouldn’t want a boozy T shirt, but I’m sure a lot of teens will be buying one and doing the whole shirt swap when out of the house thingy. Unless they do it at school, then they would be made to change. Hopefully

    • http://www.xojane.com/author/eve Eve Vawter

      Gasp. You are making me bust out my google machine to throw statistics at you: http://www.quantcast.com/urbanoutfitters.com May not be geared towards teens, but a whole mess of ‘em are shopping there.

    • Lawcat

      That tells me 75% of their market is over the age of 18. I think the headline is a bit misleading (page views?). If the headline had said “Urban Outfitters is Selling Booze T-shirts to Adults” (their main market) no one would care. Any store putting something on the market is selling items to the general public, not just teens/tweens/toddlers. It’s up the parents if they want to purchase said item…or burn it if they catch their kid in it.

  • Serena

    Urban Outfitters target demographic is 20somethings, not teens. That’s why they have an Apartment section on their site that sells home decor items. Most teens don’t live in apartments, they live with their parents.

    The idea that wearing a T-shirt about vodka would encourage teens to drink is hilarious. Most teens already drink and they don’t need a tshirt to persuade them to.