If there’s one thing everyone can agree on, it’s that parenting is tough work. Sleepless nights, constant care, and nonstop worrying all come with the territory, and many people will tell you that becoming a parent is both the best and most exhausting thing they’ve ever done. The problem is, while I think the average person respects the tireless (tiring?) efforts that go into parenting, it can be hard to sympathize with friends when they feel the need to constantly point it out. Especially when they’re pointing it out on Facebook in relation to other people’s jobs. No one posts a status update about work in the hopes of getting “one-upped” by a parent friend, because life shouldn’t be a contest, and paid jobs are not the same thing as parenting.

Mommyjacking about how hard parenting is or how a person can’t possibly understand what it’s like to “work” until he or she has become a parent is truly pointless, and yet it happens all the time. This is partly due to the fact that mommyjacking is an epidemic on the rise, and partly because people just like to talk about work a lot on Facebook. The question I have is this: Are the mommyjackers out to make their friends feel better about their lives…or worse? Here are the top five comparisons parents make when they mommyjack their friends about their jobs.

1. Moms Don’t Get a Break

That “lol” contains about a novel’s worth of bitterness, amusement, and fatigue. It’s more of a “mwahaha,” really. Not to mention, the quotes around “work week” suggest some kind of end of days reckoning. It’s like Allison is saying, “Just you wait until your prison term comes along, my dear!” while laughing maniacally and staring at a pile of laundry on the floor.

2. Moms Don’t Get Paid

I agree with Julie that being a mother of five is a severely underpaid job, but it’s vastly different from being unemployed. For instance, Joyce doesn’t have enough money and is probably actively looking for a job, whereas Julie is neither of those things.

3. Moms Get Paid In Kisses

I think it’s wonderful that stay-at-home moms get “paid” in hugs and kisses, but this is also one of the most grating forms of mommyjacking in existence. Yes, Edward just bragged about having the ability to work from home, but something about Natalie’s comment makes my teeth hurt. I feel like she just gave Edward a zerbert through the computer. Am I the only person who’s irked when a mom calls her baby her “boss”?

4. Moms Have No Sympathy

If you were a parent, you’d never make a joke about falling asleep at your desk! Parents laugh in the face of sleepiness; they don’t let it get them down. They don’t give in to yawns! Heck no! If Pink had children, she wouldn’t even worry about falling asleep at her desk because that being tired is simply child’s play. 

5. Moms Are Superior

Aw, now that is sweet, Michael. Every woman wants to be told that she should have a baby to feel valuable, and for Adriana, you were the sparkling gent in her life to fill that void. It’s about time she came to learn that being a hero, an influencer, and a problem solver are all reliant on her becoming a mother. But, here’s the thing: I think she’s talking about figuring out what kind of job to go after. Being a mom is a great accomplishment, but something tells me it’s not exactly the kind of career Adriana has in mind right now. And that’s okay.