Mommy Erotica: What To Read Instead Of ‘Fifty Shades Of Grey’

mommy porn“I loved it but the writing is abysmal.”

This line pretty much sums up how many moms feel about Fifty Shades of Grey. The book comes up every five minutes in conversation these days and it’s reached a point where it’s kind of embarrassing to admit you haven’t read it yet. That said, the masses who have read it have differing opinions on the book. I’ve heard everything from “It saved my marriage” (this is a popular one) to “You call that erotica? I’m sticking with my Penthouse letters, thankyouverymuch.”

Either way, lots of women are busy searching for a Fifty Shades equivalent now that they’re in “mommy porn” mode. Just last week, while at the supermarket, I ran into a mom from my son’s school. She wanted to know if I’ve read the book.

“Yeah, I read it,” I told her. “But I didn’t like it. I mean, some of those scenes were hot but the writing ruined it.”

She then listed off a whole whack of alternatives, books she insisted would “do the trick” but that are actually well written – or at least not as annoying/unbearable as Fifty Shades. (This is what people are talking about in the cereal aisle, by the way.) I was too scattered to write them down but since that conversation I’ve had at least a handful of friends ask what else is out there now that they’ve finished the Fifty Shades trilogy.

So, in the interest of moms everywhere, I asked around and did a bit of research. I haven’t read any of these books myself (yet), but click through to see the top recommendations from those in the know.

(Photo: CandyBox Images/Shutterstock)

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  • um…

    All I can say is that The Story of O is delightful only if you get turned on by the tale of a woman who is reduced — physically, mentally, and emotionally — to a gaping orifice.

    That’s why she’s called O — she is empty of identity unless a man fills her. How awesome. And sexy!

  • guest

    I also recommend The Sleeping Beauty Trilogy, well parts of it.

    Be warned the book covers have naked women on them.

    The writing is ok though, a bit slow, and there is an awful lot of euphemistic references to body parts which I found annoying. Too much focus on “being a pony” as well…

  • Lx

    To this day The Story of O is one of the only books that really turned me on. I don’t think it’s about a woman getting “reduced physically, mentally, and emotionally — to a gaping orifice.” as “um” said.
    To me it’s more of an elaborate, ornate, intensely erotic story of a woman relinquishing all control and surrendering to baser natures. Basically a long, detailed and very fancy “rape” story. I found it very sexy actually.

    • um…

      Well, good for you that it worked. I would have liked it better if the book wasn’t focused on arguing that a woman is happiest when she is released from the onerous task of thinking for herself, choosing her own sexual partners, or having an identity.

      I guess I don’t find rape fantasies sexy, so that’s probably why I have a problem with it.

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  • TrevorM

    Some may like this little book better than Fifty Shades….

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