It turns out that the common advice from fertility doctors about relaxing carries some weight. The New York Times blog “Well,” reported that baby-seeking women who underwent stress reduction exercises along with infertility treatments were more likely to conceive. Patients worked specifically to re-frame negative thoughts about themselves and their conception process. Instead of ruminating over thoughts like “It’s my fault for waiting too long,” and “I’ll never be happy unless I have a baby,” women showed positive results from mantras like “I’m doing everything I can to have a baby.” No wonder older women have a difficult time conceiving. Aside from not having the boundless fertility of a teenager, many are rattled with guilt for having other priorities besides having children.

The type of stress generated by such thoughts not only wreaks havocs on the self-esteem of ladies but also makes them less fertile. Dr. Alice D. Domar, a psychologist at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center in Boston, observed the following:

If you’re really stressed out and depressed, the body seems to sense that’s not a good time to get pregnant. There’s something about practicing relaxation techniques or being with other women who understand what you’re going through, probably a combination of everything, that makes a difference. It isn’t just about relaxing.

Surrounding yourself with other hopeful moms-to-be who aren’t judging you for getting a few other things out of the way before starting a family sounds like a good practice in general. Even if you’re not hoping for a new addition.